Monday, May 07, 2007

The Rocket Man Returns

Roger Clemens

Sorry about that weird two line post that got cut off and seemed to advertise for Cingular. I was at the yankee game, with my uncle, his client and a friend, and Roger Clemens shocked everyone and declared he was coming back to the Yanks (which I later found out, took 28 million and perks up to wazoo). I got excited. I wanted to be the first to break the story on my blog. So I tried to publish an entry by cell phone. Clearly, it didn't work.

The Yankee-Seattle game had already seen its share of historic firsts. The first time Darrell Rasner pitched a good game. The first time Wil Nieves and Josh Phelps combined to start a bench clearing brawl. The first time this season that a jelly doughnut slowed down the 4 train (in the daily "Subway Race game on the jumbotron).

Then the bottom of the seventh was about to start. "America the Beautiful" played, then "Take Me Out To The Ballgame" started up. Right after "peanuts and crackerjacks," the song suddenly cut off. Bob Sheppard, the Yankees 200-year old announcer, told the crowd to direct its attention to the owners box behind home plate for an important announcement. Then, on the jumbotron, Roger's face appeared.

It took me a split second to realize it was him. The Rocket. The guy I saw win the 300th game of his career at Yankee stadium. But the crowd started chanting "Roger! Roger! Roger! Roger!" The Rocket said he'd see us again real soon. Highlights played to the sound of Elton John's "Rocket Man." Steinbrenner had done it. He'd buoyed the hopes of every Yankee fan and sunk the hearts of every Red Sox Asshole (hey.. they LIKE that nickname, ok?) And it only cost him 4.5 million a month. Plus, Roger gets to ride Yankee General Manager Brian Cashman like a horse whenever he feels like it.

It was a monumental day for the Yankees. People are already predicting he'll have 12-15 wins and an ERA of around 3.00-- helping the Yanks win the pennant. That's pretty super for a 44 year old. Hell, it's super for a 25 year old.

Interesting side note. Roger will now be on the same team as A-Rod, whom he infamously knocked down twice in the ALCS while picthing for the Yanks. Of course, Clemens also threw a pitch at his own son's head, so I'm sure it was nothing personal. These two should get along.

Rocket, welcome back.

P.S. ESPN's Page 2 featured this great animation.

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