Wednesday, November 03, 2010

An In-Depth Analysis Of Why Prop 19, To Legalize Weed In California, Failed

Homer Simpson, Weed Rally

A protest rally is being held. The band Phish appear and play the first couple of lines from "Run Like An Antelope". They suddenly stop for something.

SINGER
Okay, okay, hold on, hold on. (sniffing the air) I smell marijuana smoke. That better be medicinal.

PIANIST
If Phish don't see a prescription slip, we are outa here!

DRUMMER
We can wait all night, people.

Hans Moleman (wearing a psychedelic T-shirt) holds up his prescription slip.

DRUMMER
Here we go. (reads it) Whoa. This guy is seriously ill.

HANS MOLEMAN
My doctor never told me that. I had to hear it from Phish.

SINGER
A-one, a-two, a-you know what to do.

They continue with their song. A little while later, they incorporate the Simpsons theme tune into their set.

PIANIST
Thank you! And now, a man who's a real po-thead... I'm sorry, pot-head... Homer Simpson!

HOMER
Good afternoon. I wanna thank you all for coming down here, taking time off from your jobs... (crowd all mutter "Jobs?") Cause we need to keep medical marijuana legal! (crowd cheer) Whether you suffer from glaucoma, or you just rented The Matrix, medical marijuana can make things fabulous! ...medically. (crowd cheer) So my mellow fellow citizens, when you go into that voting booth on Tuesday the 7th...

GUITARIST
Uh, Homer... that was yesterday.

Homer goes to a newspaper-dispenser and buys a newspaper.


HOMER
Oh man, they already voted! And we lost! (crowd groan) Oh man I can't believe we spaced on the date!

OTTO
Well, what are we gonna do?

HOMER
Well we can't just stand here staring at our hands. Although... (looks at hands) Wow!

OTTO
(sees ring on finger) Whoa! Oh, that's right, I married that chick.

Everyone leaves. That night, Homer and Otto are still on the stage.


OTTO
They call 'em fingers, but I never see them 'fing'. Oh, there they go.

-From The Simpsons, "Weekend At Burnsie's," Season 13, Episode 18.

Visitor Map: