Friday, August 25, 2006

Pluto Is A Planet

Planet Pluto Baby!

Show your Pluto Pride!!!
Shmucks For Jesus

Comedian Jackie Mason is suing the religious cult "Jews For Jesus" because they used his name and picture in a brochure attempting to lure people into joining their wacko group.

Apparently, the brochure shows an image of Jackie next to the question, "Jackie Mason, A Jew For Jesus?" Nowhere in the pamphlet does it give the answer--"No."

Needless to say, Mason was a bit taken aback.

"Everyone knows, I am as Jewish as a matzo ball or kosher salami," the comedian said.

Not surprisingly, the delusional cult doesn't see what the big deal is. So what if they implied a proud Jew is in fact a Jew For Jesus? What's wrong with fudging the religion of someone in order to fool other people into joining a spurious religious order?

"Shame on him for getting so upset about this," said the Christian spokeswom... I mean Jews For Jesus spokeswoman. "We claimed the Dalai Lama was a Jew for Jesus last week and he didn't complain."

(Note, the second part of that quote may have been merely implied.)

In other news, New York City officials responded to yesterday's Adam's Life blog post, urging CBS to drop Survivor: Race War from their schedule.

In a statement, CBS said that while they welcome debate on the issue, they don't give a shit.

"‘Survivor’ is a program that is no stranger to controversy," the statement said. Like, for example, the show had a naked guy on it once.

"It’s much safer to say, ‘No, let’s just stick with things the way they are. Let’s don’t be the network to rock the boat. Let’s not have “Survivor” try something new. But it's about time a reality show stood up to say, fuck this PC bullshit, I wanna see some black people and white people fight," said Johnny Shmobst, stunt double to Survivor host Jeff Probst. "I just don't see why people are offended by splitting people of different races into camps and getting rid of the weaker ones in elimination ceremonies." He also said that this year, instead of at a campfire, those ceremonies will be held in specially designed shower stalls. "It adds to the suspense," Shmobst said. He then laughed crazily, combusted into a fireball and disappeared.

Wednesday, August 23, 2006

Where Is Bin Laden??

Just watched Christiane Amanpour's documentary on Osama Bin Laden. Chilling.

Saturday and Sunday night at 7PM CNN will run it again. I urge you to see it. Among things I learned:

Number of U.S. Troops in Tora Bora at the time Bin Laden escaped: 50 to 60.

How many would have been sufficient: 600, according to a U.S. commander.

Bin Laden has sought, and recieved, a religious blessing from an Islamic sheik to kill up to 10 million people with a nuclear weapon.

As Christna put it at the end, "His holy war is far, far from over."

Can we get this guy already??
CBS: The Eye Goes Racist

Grand Wizard Jeff Probst

Which race is the best?

Finally television viewers will discover the answer, thanks to CBS's long-running reality show Survivor.

Not wanting to be outdone by ABC's puff piece on the white supremacist Olsen twins, CBS is devoting its 13th season of Survivor to examining the age-old question-- who can eat bugs, light fires and perform inane log rolling tasks better: whites, blacks, asians or hispanics?

No, I'm not making this up.

"I know, from where I sit, I found it to be one of the freshest ideas we've had going back to the beginning of this show in season one," says Survivor host Jeff Probst.

Yes, good old fashioned racism! What a fresh idea!!!

"The idea for this actually came from the criticism that 'Survivor' was not ethnically diverse enough," Probst also said.

So people said the show wasn't diverse enough... so you decided to create a show segregating people into races and putting them in competition with each other?? As opposed to putting them all together??

"I think it's very natural to assume that certain groups are going to have audience members rooting for them simply because they share ethnicity." Probst again.

Yes, I can picture it now. The KKK sponsoring "Survivor parties" in which members sit around rooting for the whites! What a great way to foster... "ethnic pride"???

Apparently the show's new commitment to "Diversity" didn't include geographic diversity. 15 out of the 20 contestants are from either New York or California.

Reality Blurred writer Andy Dehnart says that dividing the tribes by race is no different than dividing them by sex or age, as has been done by Survivor in the past. But I would argue that men haven't put women in internment camps, forced them to pick cotton or built fences to keep them out of the country. Competition between the sexes, or between people of different ages has always centered around perceived differences in physical and mental strength. The battle of the sexes and the battle bewteen age groups both transcend racial and cultural lines. But competition between races has been based on little more than ideological and cultural biases. Therefore, dividing people by race is not merely arbitrary, as Dehnart says, but in addition hearkens back to some of humanity's most grotesque beliefs and actions. And, um, I hate to state the obvious.. but you're not appealing to "ethnic pride" when you group all Koreans, Japanese and Chinese people into an "Asian" group, and putting other subcultures into groups based on skin color. "Ethnic pride" has nothing to do with skin color. What Probst is really talking about is "racial pride"-- a term you'll find used most often by members of White-Supremacist groups. Making Probst's version of "ethnic pride" the basis for a reality show is, at the very least, poor taste, and at worst, an appeal to people's worst prejudices.

Can't wait to see how this "Battle of the Races" turns out. Or if the tv watching public will even tune in to this crap.

Monday, August 21, 2006

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