Emerson, Whitman, Chincoteague

"Conrad Burns will be known to future generations as the man who killed wild horses."

Years ago, I went on a trip with my parents, my sister, and my cousin to Chincoteague, home to the wild horses.

We had a tour guide who spoke something that wouldn't even be remotely considered English. The bus was cold, the weather wasn't that great out, even in mid-summer. The sky was overcast, we were wearing sweatshirts to shield us from the wind.

But then we saw them. The wild horses.

There's a feeling you get when you see something as majestic as a mustang, running wild through a field. It's like you shrink and swell at the same time. Shrink because you're suddenly aware at how large the world really is, despite all the ways in which we've made it seem smaller. And swell because, at the moment you witness something wild like that, something free and powerful, it fills you with a sense that there is a greater force flowing through this world, through all of us. Our lives are magical, mystical, miraculous. To see the wild horses of Chincoteague, unsaddled, untethered, unbroken, was to see everything we take for granted: our freedom, our individuality, our spirit. A living metaphor for humanity.

Reading the article above made me sad. Not only for the horses, but for us. Call me a sentimental crybaby liberal-face, but I think there's something wrong with our system when callous congressmen have the power to take a thing of beauty and sell it to the slaughterhouse.

I'm no vegetarian, I'm not a member of PETA. I just know what I saw on that family vacation, and what I felt. If only people the people like Conrad Burns would open up their hearts and take the time to feel it too.

Can't We All Just Get Along



Racism runs rampant in the Washington D.C. area, The Washington Post reported today. Racism against black squirrels.

In Montgomery, the black squirrels are spreading into Gaithersburg and Rockville -- though not without a little controversy.

Some residents have called to complain that the new squirrels are aggressive, driving out the friendly gray squirrels, said Bill Hamilton of the county Department of Park and Planning.

He said he reassures residents: "It's the same squirrel," just a different color.

Among themselves, the squirrels appear to feel the same way, according to Vagn Flyger, a retired University of Maryland professor.

Flyger devoted himself to studying squirrels because, as he explains it, they weigh less than a deer and don't bite like a polar bear. He used to smear a tree behind his Silver Spring home with a mixture of peanut butter and Valium and then tattoo the squirrels that he found passed out below.

He has studied their behavior -- now using feeders rather than Valium -- and determined that the squirrels don't appear to treat each other differently because they are black or gray.

"They don't seem to care," he said.

Never mind the fact that this guy drugged squirrels and then tattooed them. (We've all done it before). But perhaps us human beings can learn a thing or two from the squirrel population.

Before we start judging squirrels for the color of their fur, we've got to look in the mirror and ask ourselves "Where does our hate come from?"

Its time to stop hating and start loving all squirrels (and people too). Cause in the end, the worms can't tell the difference.

So donate to your local NAACS (National Association for the Advancement of Colored Squirrels) and do your part to clear away old sterotypes.

And if you see any trees smeared with peanut butter, for God's sake, don't lick them.

Star Crossed Lovers



I just can't wait until Britney and Kevin's "Chaotic" love documentary appears on UPN.

Among the revelations about their relationship, on the Ellen Show today:

Britney proposed to Kevin. (very liberated!)

Kevin said No. (He doesn't typically like marrying the mothers of his children)

Then Kevin proposed to Britney. (She reminded him that she's filthy rich, and, according to early reviews of "Chaotic," a nympho)

Britney said yes. (Duh, she like, just proposed)

However, even funnier than Britney bragging to her assistant about having sex "three times today" (according to the Washington Post) was Britney's answer to "What's the best part about marriage??"

"Being pregnant," the pop queen responded.

Oh, Britney. If that's it, this marriage is only going to last another couple of months. Unless she turns Orthodox Jewish and starts churning the kids out.

Kevin's answer?

Make up sex.

Never a more star-crossed pair have mine eyes seen.

Let The Censorship Begin!

"People need to be very careful about what they say just as people need to be careful about what they do." -Donald Rumsfeld, commenting on a Newsweek story which allegedly prompted riots in Afghanistan.

"My goodness, why does it take so long for someone to come back with and have the actual facts? Well, it takes a long time to be truthful." - Donald Rumsfeld, being hypocritical.

So Newsweek said that U.S. interrigators flushed the Quran, the Muslim holy book, down the toilet. Nevermind that the allegation may be true. The big thing is, eleven days after the article was published, riots broke out in Afghanistan, and the Bush administration blamed Newsweek, saying that the news weekly's lies got people killed.

Lies getting people killed? Isn't that more of a Bush thing?

Bush and Co., after sitting down to watch Spin City and listen to the Spin Doctors and Spin yarns while taking a Spin class, somehow was able to get away with blaming the media, yet again, for a violent outbreak halfway around the world. And so far, everyone's eaten it up, asked for second helpings, and is calling for journalists' heads on platters.

Doesn't it occur to anyone that, A. The Quran accusation just might be true given what we know of the situation in Abu Ghraib and elsewhere (and that it took 11 days for Bush and Co. to deny the story), or B. That... hmm, maybe it's Bush's policies that are making the Muslim world so mad? You know, policies like jailing people and charging them with no crime?

No. It's the journalists fault, right? We're irresponsible. The job of reporting the news should go to the people we trust. Like Bill O'Reilly.

In the words of Kit Kat, Give me a break.

The truth is, Newsweek did give journalism and the media a black eye. But it wasn't reporting the story. It was bowing to pressure and retracting it. They looked at CBS, which took so much flack over the Bush National Guard memo (which has yet to be proven a fake-- despite a nice animation right wingers like to look at in between visits to anncoutlernaked.com) and the folks at Newsweek started to panic. They sunk to their knees faster than Jenna Bush at a frat party. The result is a form of self-censorship that sets the journalism movement back decades. How can we report on the abuses of this administration, where, according to Rumsfeld, we need to watch what we say? Did reporting on Abu Ghraib incite Muslim violence? Should we have kept silent, shoved the pictures in a drawer and pretended it didn't happen? And should we likewise ignore the daily bombings, the thousands of civilian deaths, the hundreds in top-secret prison facilities around the globe that may be terrorists but may also be cab drivers?

Are we supposed to ignore it? On the chance that telling the world might get the world angry at us?

According to Rumsfeld, yes.

There's your moral values right there.

Rite of Passage

Will They Play Hava Nagilah??


Plus: Man washes up on beach- plays piano. Who gets the rights to the screenplay? (Ewan Macgregor as the pianist, and Sandra Bullock as the nurse that falls in love with him.) Piano Man