Friday, April 09, 2010

Apple Pulls A "She's All That" On The iPad

She's All iPad

In the landmark 1999 film, She's All That, Freddie Prinze Jr., with the help of his sister, Anna Paquin, makeover the dorkiest girl in school, Laney Boggs, and turn her into, well, one of the hottest girls on the planet, Rachel Leigh Cook. All it really took was removing the glasses and throwing away those paint-covered overalls.

Well, Steve Jobs and Apple have done the same thing to the iPad. When news of the device first came out, many people, myself included, compared it unfavorably to a certain feminine hygiene product. But the gripes went beyond the name. The criticism boiled down to this: it was a giant iPhone without the phone. The iPhone software, which allowed one application open at a time, made sense for a phone, because how much multitasking can you really do on such a small device? But for the iPad, it was limiting. Why buy an iPad for a netbook price when it won't even allow you the basic functionality of a netbook: mainly, to be able to surf the web, type, and maybe watch a movie or something all at the same time. The iPad seemed like a total dork: a gadget with no real use to anybody.

But yesterday, Apple announced that the new iPad/iPhone software will ALLOW MULITASKING. Suddenly, the glasses are off. The iPad is wearing a skimpy dress and walking slowly down the stairs to the tune of "Kiss Me," by Sixpence None The Richer.

Now, the iPad CAN be like a netbook. It can handle more than one thing at once. Instead of having to hang out in a dingy basement while you paint, you can IM with friends or upload your collection to Facebook. You can move back and forth between apps effortlessly, without resetting the applications and losing data. And for goodness sakes: now some of the apps that were crappy because you had to leave them open for them to work, well, they can actually function normally now.

I may have made fun of her before, but with this new feature, the iPad changes from a gadget into something more closely resembling a fully functional computer... and that's a device any guy would like to bring to the prom.

Gratuitous Additional Picture Of Rachael Leigh Cook


[For my ultimate cell phone ideas: Click Here. For other ways to use your cell phone for FUN! Click Here.]

Thursday, April 08, 2010

Tiger's Cub

Maybe Tiger Woods really is a sex addict. I thought he was just a scumbag, but there's got to be something mentally wrong for Tiger to sleep with a 9-year-old girl.

What's that? Oh, no, technically, Tiger's latest bimbette isn't 9 anymore. But she was that age when Tiger Woods first met her, upon moving in to her neighborhood. Can you imagine? Tiger watched the girl next door grow up... and said "Man, I wanna bang that!"

What's next for Tiger? Using his dead father to try to win sympathy and forgiveness for himself?


I really don't see how Elin can hang on after these latest revelations. I mean, if he cheated once, it's a mistake. He cheats a dozen times, he's a mistake. But he cheats on you with a kid as well?

I'd love not to pay attention to any of this, but it's fascinating. Each revelation in this Tiger scandal's been worse than the previous one. How long before we find there's a been few more 9-year-olds in Tiger's bedroom?

Monday, April 05, 2010

Mark Buehrle Is Amazing

Last year, the Chicago White Sox pitcher impressed everyone by throwing a perfect game despite being severely underrated by everyone. This year, he.. well... watch it:


Visitor Map: