Thursday, April 14, 2005

I've Been Obsessed With This For A Week

I've been to San Francisco, Seattle, Miami Beach and Washington D.C. I've toured the unspoiled coastline of southern California, and checked out the Cohen residence in the O.C. I've seen glaciers in Alaska and witnessed for myself the oddity that is Area 51. I've raced down the interstate, heading south for the border, watching the farms and truck stops fly by. I've stopped by my former girlfriends' houses, gone back to my old camp, and took a spin around my old high school-- without being seen as one of those "weird kids" who still hangs out around his old high school.

All in one day.

All without leaving my chair.

How was it possible? A new time machine/teleportation device?

No.

Google.

Google Maps, to be precise. Google Satellite Maps, to be even more precise. Its the biggest time waster since Snood, and I've been touring the country, dropping in on unsuspecting friends' houses, and imagining statewide car chases ever since I discovered it.

Click this, then click "satellite" Enjoy

Here's a list of some landmarks you can check out. Also, proof I'm not the only one obsessed with this: Points of Interest

My neighborhood: Wayside,NJ

My high school: Pennington

My summers: Bradley Beach

My buddy's house??! Yikes! I can't believe he has a wife and a dog and... ok..: A J

Where I played Little League: Colt Field

Very Few People Know why this place means something to me: Those that do, don't tell!

Where the Rich People Live, Part I: Deal, NJ

Where the Rich People Live, Part II: Rumson, NJ

My Mall Is Huge!!: Monmouth Mall

Where I Live Now: Sty Town Baby!!!

The ex: I think...

I knew there was a secret government facility nearby!!!: Whats with the black square?

The Other Mall: They Have A Value City!!! (Note: Actually, there is no mall anymore, its an Applebees and a Target

My Elementary School: Its name? WAYSIDE SCHOOL. As in, the book Wayside School Is Falling Down. As you can see, not nearly as exciting as the book.

My Camp: Sexplo? Oh the memories

Where I Spent My Thanksgivings: The Concord The Best Of Times... may it rest in peace.

It Even Looks Fun From Space: Six Flags Great Adventure!!! Zoom in for a closer look. Don't you wish you could see the babboons in the safari park??

Look how pretty!!: Jersey City, Polka Dots USA

Fuck the Terrorists: Where's Bin Laden?

You can't see the vomiting post-prom kids from space: Part I: Wildwood

You can't see the vomiting post-prom kids from space: Part II: Seaside Heights

Speaking of Space: A Space Shuttle, a Rocket, and More!!!

Mysteries!!!!

Weird stuff I found:

Somewhere, near, in Boston: A giant marble?

In the desert in Utah: Somebody Burn a hole in the map?

Aliens?: Area 51

Ok, thats it for now. Yeah, I know, I have way too much time on my hands. Sad thing is, I'm at work. (just kidding, employers)

Monday, April 11, 2005

Yee-haww Florida!

Ever wanna shoot someone first and ask questions later?

Well the state of Florida, home to the nation's largest population with failing eyesight, is about to approve a bill saying that you can shoot just about anybody you perceive as threatening.

KKK Member: I didn't want to shoot him officer, but he was just so black, I was scaaarrrred.

Officer: That's ok, it's perfectly understandable.

Read the article here: Florida Loves Guns

It's funny, Jeb Bush loves life so much, he'll step in to save Terri Schiavo and approve gun-toting maniac legislation within a span of a couple weeks. Only in America, right?

Shoot first, ask questions later.

Now that's "erring on the side of life."

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