Thursday, January 05, 2006

Anti-Semites Force Second Avenue Deli To Close

2nd Ave. Deli

First CBGB's, now this.

It was reported this morning that 2nd Avenue Deli's landlord, Jonis Realty, wants to raise the rent a whopping $9,000. Owner Jack Lebewohl can't afford that on top of renovations needed to bring the restaurant up to code. So until further notice, 2nd Ave. Deli, the premier Jewish deli in New York since 1954, and favorite of stars such as Woody Allen and Larry David, has closed its doors.

According to, Jonis Realty also owns a building down the street at 2nd Ave. and St. Marks. They de-rent-controlled several apartments there and jacked up rents. The place now makes Jonis upwards of $1.4 million annually.

So they have money. What could motivate them to drive 2nd Ave. Deli out of business?

One of their partners is Ira Fishman, which sounds pretty German to me.

But on a serious note, 2nd Ave. Deli is the best deli in New York, period. I know those who stand by Katz's, which serves up its dry, tough and tasteless brisket cafeteria style, but for me, 2nd Ave. Deli is a taste of New York you can't get anywhere else in the city. It's sad to think I may never be able to have matzoh ball soup and a turkey sandwich w/ russian dressing there again.

The East Village is getting hot right now, and that's causing alot of it's institutions to close in favor of luxury condos for Britney Spears. Somebody's got to stop those Hollywood anti-semites from moving into our neighborhood and replacing all our delis and nosheries with their Subways and Starbucks.

Shouldn't Mayor Bloomberg step in? He's Jewish. If they closed a BBQ place in texas, I'm sure Governor Bush would step in. What, he's not their governor anymore? He's the President????? Are you sure? I'm almost certain he's been at his ranch for most of the last 5 years.

But I digress. 2nd Ave. Deli, I'll miss your giant matzoh balls, like mammoth islands in a sea of golden broth. I'll miss your overstuffed sandwiches, so overflowing with meat I needed to order extra rye bread. I'll miss your crinkle-cut fries, perfectly crisp, your cole slaw-- not too sweet, not gobbed with mayonaise. I'll miss those insufficiently large cans of Dr. Brown's Black Cherry, the baked beans in the little ceramic pot, the free pickles and health salad. I'll miss the wait staff, who all looked as if they had started working there in 1954... and all of whom did. I'll miss seeing that awning in white and blue, letters in a font vaguely resembling Hebrew, reminding me of my heritage in the shadows of the church in Stuyvesant square.

Most of all, I'll miss that absolutely full feeling I'd have after leaving. A feeling that often took 2 magazines to get rid of.

Don't close, 2nd Ave. Deli! Like our ancestors, we must survive, despite those who would seek to destroy us. What would Moses do?

Ariel Sharon

As you undoubtedly know, Ariel Sharon suffered a severe stroke. No matter your feelings about the man (he doesn't have a lot of fans among the Palestinians, who've accused him of a Mai Lai style massacre), his effort to bring peace to Israel and Palestine has gone further than most efforts before it. Sharon bucked the wishes of the powerful orthodox party and gave up the Gaza strip, and despite his decision to build the West Bank wall, he has set the stage for Israel's large scale withdrawal from the former Palestinian territories. Few leaders in Israel had the political guts to make such moves, but he made them in the name of peace. I hope Sharon can recover. Most of all, I hope for more leaders in the Middle East who are willing to do what it takes to stop the violence-- leaders who will make peace a reality instead of merely a process.

Of course, some people don't like what Ariel Sharon did for peace. Like good old Pat "God Smote New Orleans" Robertson:

(Sent in by reader Barry K.:) This is pretty f-ed up.


Carole said...

What do you think about the new film of Spielberg (intitled "Münich")?

I haven't seen this film yet, but maybe you have done.

Some people say that it's unobjective and that Spielberg defends the side of Israel.

I would like to have your opinion about this question.

I'm a french girl student in exchange in Canada, so sorry if I make some mistakes.

Adam said...

I actually haven't seen Munich yet, so I can't comment on it. I've heard from some people it's pro-Palestinian and I've heard from others that it's pro-Israeli.

The last movie I saw was "The Family Stone," which was awful.

Thanks for visiting my blog! Bonne Année!

Anonymous said...

Did you see that Jonis is renting the Second Avenue Deli site to Hooters? Men who can't hold their beer will be puking on the Yiddish Walk of Fame. Oy.

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