Government Thwarts Plot To Blow Up Airplanes With Heisman Trophy
The New Face Of Terror
Thank God for our rational, intelligent, and efficient airport screening system. Thanks to the TSA, we've already eliminated the threat of hair gel from our friendly skies. And if it weren't for our terrific, perfectly logical system, we could be reading right now about America's worst airline tragedy since 9/11. Thanks to our ever watchful government, the plot to blow up airliners with the Heisman Trophy has been thwarted.
Now we can all breathe a sigh of relief.
(Four books of matches are still allowed, by the way)