Tuesday, March 28, 2006

Ex-Clay Fans "Akien" To Get Some Money

Clay, Gay? Say It Aint So!

A group of 9 poorly-educated* ex-Clay Aiken fans have decided to sue Sony/BMG for false advertising. Apparently, Sony/BMG made people think Clay Aiken was straight, when, by many accounts, he's gay. I must have missed the CD promos that said "Come get Clay's new album!!! He's straight!!!"

Angry at the fact that Simon Cowell called them crazy, the nancy-pants nine (who do not want to reveal their names because they actually bought a Clay Aiken album) called Simon a "pretend judge." Apparently, the word "judge," in their estimation, only refers to the legal entity, and not judges of talent competitions, figure skating events, and chili cook-offs.

"This is part of a culture of institutional deception behind James Frye, Jason Blair, ENRON, Milli Vanilli, Ashley Simpson and now Clay Aiken. We believe that it is the difference between private behavior versus public responsibility."

For the record, ex-Aiken-fans, its James Frey and Jayson Blair. And the record companies had nothing to do with them. Or ENRON. (Although I hear Ken Lay did have a band called the Cheater Cheater Pumpkin Eaters).

Now, suing the record companies for Ashley Simpson might actually be a case with merit. But Clay, nor any of the marketing supporting him ever said, "Hey America, this is one straight male." In fact, it was pretty obvious that Clay wasn't exactly the most manliest of men. Even Ryan Seacrest was a little uncomfortable pissing in the urinal next to him.

Ah lawsuit-happy world, with such people in it!

*based on a close reading of their mistake-ridden press release

PLUS: Is Kerry Allergic To Tomatoes? Maybe if the Kerry team spent more time on strategy and less time picking celery out of Kerry's tuna salad, he would have won the election.

No comments:

Visitor Map: