Saturday, February 11, 2006

Well, I Called It

It doesn't get more entertaining than tonight's opening ceremonies.

One reason I love the Olympics is Bob Costas. He's really the best. I cannot say this more heterosexually: I love the guy.

First off, he knows his stuff. You know he isn't reading this shit off a teleprompter. He just knows it.

When the parade of nations began, I was pretty sure I heard "Celebrate," the reknowned bar-mitzvah song. But I thought I had to be mistaken. This was the parade of nations! Not Pheobes on 80's night.

But then I heard "I Will Survive."

Thats when I started taking notes:

Brian Williams pointed out the unique dresses all the sign holders wore. They were shaped like the alps. That's some Olympic style that has to be incorporated into the mainstream.

There's something a little bit wrong about Bosnia entering to the song "Freak Out!" But perhaps more appropriate than "I Will Survive."

Speaking of Olympic style: Mark My Words: Those Mongolian Hats Are Hot And Will Be HUUUUGE

As I watched I really was overcome by these small nations that struggle to even get to the games, much less compete in them. In one poor country, the villages collected money just to get their team to Torino. I want every small nation to win.

Video Killed The Radio Star!!!! This is getting out of hand!

Sign of the Zodiac??? I don't even remember that song! They're playing obscure 80's hits now???

This is why I love Costas and Williams:

"If I hear Betty ----, I'm gonna"

Brian Williams: "Donna Summers did it for me."

10:24 PM: I still hate the Russians.

Frozen Guy Commercial????? Chevy? What the hell....

That is one hot girl from Serbia and Montenegro. Looks a bit like Katarina Witt. That rhymes sorta.

Costas has so much information. I bet you he's not reading any of this off a teleprompter.... oh I already said this.

10:29 PM- Y M C A ! ! ! ! !

Costas: "And what tour of American Pop Music from the 80's would be complete without the village people?"

Costas gets mad, "You think the nation of Denmark requested this!?"

10:30 PM- Costas has had enough of this shit.

I wish I had Tivo.

10:31 PM- U.S.A.!!! U.S.A.!!!

10:32 PM- B O D E

10:36 PM- Weird McDonalds Ad. Kid looks like Ronald McDonald, sits next to him on a park bench. Disturbing.

10:43 PM- Burn Baby Burn!!!!?!?! Who's DJaying this shit? Unique Musique?

The Italians get trumpets... oh wait, its electronic. Somne Italian pop song.

10:46 PM- MILF Alert! That is one Italian hottie.

10:55 PM- Costas is a genius, possibly the smartest man on the planet. The female commentator? "The Renaissance was in the 14th century." REEEAAALLLY??

11:03 PM- Costas calls it: "We've never seen Ferraris at the opening ceremonies before."

Susan Sarandon! The Republicans are not going to like this.

Weird Climby Guys Forming A Dove sort of look like little snowflakes.

Is that Yoko Ono reading the peace poem??? To Disney music?

Imagine! As sung by Peter Gabriel!!! I'm beginning to think VH1 is responsible for this opening ceremony.

Actually, this is a great version. I will iTunes the shit out of it.

All the athletes swaying, all singing the same song. That is a beautiful sight that's got to give you a lot of hope for humanity.

Dude, during the commercial, I realize MSNBC and Yahoo have already published accounts of what happened. Isn't that cheating? I hate tape delay.

Irony, Alberto Tomba, who enters with the torch, is nicknamed "La Bamba"

Williams: "Who actually lights the torch is a best kept secret." Except we already know who did it.

Debra Campononi, very cute.

And it's lit! Nice fireworks.

Final surprise?

Ahh! Pavarotti! You can't have an Italian opening ceremony without opera.

I can see the headlines now: Ceremonies Over After Fat Man Sings

Well. Anyways, awesome ceremony. Now to play some Madden.

No comments:

Visitor Map: