The Streak
The Men's U.S. Olympic Curling Team has broken their 28 year streak of finishing out of medal contention. They won the bronze.
But the 28-year streak wasn't the only streak that came into today's competition:
Chicken Man
Streaking at a CURLING MATCH???? That settles it. Curling is a sport.
Friday, February 24, 2006
Thursday, February 23, 2006
An Eventful Morning-I Meet Alberto
If you're just now finding this blog, the #1 blog on the web according to my mother, then chances are you've read my article on MSNBC today, Fly The Cell-Free Skies... While You Still Can. It's my second MSNBC article, and the first time anyone's mentioned Tamagachis in well over 4 years.
I also mentioned a song in the first paragraph, which presumably got cut for space. I'd like to promote it here. "In The Sun," an excellent Joseph Arthur song in its own right, has been rerecorded by Joseph, R.E.M. frontman Michael Stipe, and that guy who named his kid Apple. The "In The Sun" EP is available on iTunes, and it's for a good cause-- money goes to Hurricane Katrina relief. It remains vital that we pay attention to New Orleans and continue to aid in the recovery of the city and the rest of the gulf coast. Mardi Gras may be coming up, but there's still not a lot to celebrate in the Big Easy. (Like toxic sludge.)
Now to today's momentous and ironic event. I met Alberto Gonzales.
For those of you who read this blog (hey mom, hey dad!), you know that me and Alberto don't exactly see eye to eye. I like playing Madden, he likes listening to phone calls. I'm a big Jets fan, Alberto enjoys torture. To each his own.
I attended a round-table discussion about Human Trafficking, hosted by Alberto and the Office of Public Affairs. The report they gave us is embargoed until March 16th, so I can't really talk about it. But in general, the report shows the efforts and progress the Bush administration has made in fighting this modern form of slavery, in which young, impoverished girls are lured to the U.S. with the promise of jobs, love, or safety and are then turned into indentured servants, sweatshop workers and prostitutes.
After passing through a metal detector, I entered the main conference room. It was not a large crowd.
There were 4 other reporters there. From Glamour, Parents Magazine, Ladies Home Journal, and People. Not exactly your "hard news" lineup.
They were there for the same reason I was. Human Trafficking is a "hot" story, like Blackberrys and MySpace. The woman from People was practically drooling as she asked Alberto if he could help her "get in touch" with some of the victims. "We've been trying to get a victim for a long time," she said. Ah, People. In what other magazine can you learn Britney Spears loves K-Fed soooo much and also read about a sexually abused illegal immigrant? What was Glamour's angle... "This month, we give a victim of human trafficking a makeover she'll never forget!!!"?
The other reporters were all women. Alberto entered and said, "Welcome Ladies." Then he saw me. A few seconds passed. "And gentleman."
In this intimate setting, Alberto sat across from me at the conference room table. From my vantage point, I observed a funny little mannerism.
Alberto does this thing with his hands. He rests his wrists on the table, and just sort of pushes out with his fingers while he's speaking:
Sometimes he thrusts downward instead of up.
The wrists never leave the table. At one point, he played with a napkin. Just a funny little quirk.
He mentioned his how being a Mexican-American made the issue of Human Trafficking especially important to him. A large number of women are lured into the states from Mexico. Apparently, this is a growing problem that the government is taking seriously. Alberto seemed sincere when he said this was a priority of the administration. Where it ranks compared to the war in Iraq, the war in Afghanistan, Hurricane relief and banning gay marriage, he didn't say. But I find it hard to hate on Alberto. He was quiet and unassuming, shook hands with everybody, answered most of our questions (although he said he'd have to get back to me on how the government is supporting non-governmental organizations dedicated to fighting human trafficking)
Now you're probably wondering. Did you hit him with any hard questions? Did you reem him out for defending the policies of torture and unaccountable spying?
Well. No. I couldn't. For the sole reason that I was there representing a magazine, and the magazine has no political interests. So it would have been unprofessional to go off topic. Fun, but unprofessional.
He did say his priorities were to "Promote the American dream" and "Assure protection of civil rights." I have no reason to doubt him on this. He seemed sincere. He didn't say anything, however, about how torture and unauthorized spying play into those priorities.
Afterward, I called my mom. "The attorney general? Of the United States?" she said, surprised, when I called to tell her about my morning. "I thought you were meeting the attorney general of New York!"
"They don't send reporters from such prestigious news outlets as Glamour and Ladies Home Journal to cover the attorney general of New York, Mom," I said.
We'll have to wait and see which magazine writes the Human Trafficking "scoop" first. In the meantime, tell your impoverished friends in other countries that it may not be such a swell idea to take that guy up on his offer of free travel to the U.S. in exchange for some... services. And visit ijm.org to find out what you can do.
And please, give my MSNBC article a 5 dammit. I work hard for your sake. Don't be a hater!
If you're just now finding this blog, the #1 blog on the web according to my mother, then chances are you've read my article on MSNBC today, Fly The Cell-Free Skies... While You Still Can. It's my second MSNBC article, and the first time anyone's mentioned Tamagachis in well over 4 years.
I also mentioned a song in the first paragraph, which presumably got cut for space. I'd like to promote it here. "In The Sun," an excellent Joseph Arthur song in its own right, has been rerecorded by Joseph, R.E.M. frontman Michael Stipe, and that guy who named his kid Apple. The "In The Sun" EP is available on iTunes, and it's for a good cause-- money goes to Hurricane Katrina relief. It remains vital that we pay attention to New Orleans and continue to aid in the recovery of the city and the rest of the gulf coast. Mardi Gras may be coming up, but there's still not a lot to celebrate in the Big Easy. (Like toxic sludge.)
Now to today's momentous and ironic event. I met Alberto Gonzales.
For those of you who read this blog (hey mom, hey dad!), you know that me and Alberto don't exactly see eye to eye. I like playing Madden, he likes listening to phone calls. I'm a big Jets fan, Alberto enjoys torture. To each his own.
I attended a round-table discussion about Human Trafficking, hosted by Alberto and the Office of Public Affairs. The report they gave us is embargoed until March 16th, so I can't really talk about it. But in general, the report shows the efforts and progress the Bush administration has made in fighting this modern form of slavery, in which young, impoverished girls are lured to the U.S. with the promise of jobs, love, or safety and are then turned into indentured servants, sweatshop workers and prostitutes.
After passing through a metal detector, I entered the main conference room. It was not a large crowd.
There were 4 other reporters there. From Glamour, Parents Magazine, Ladies Home Journal, and People. Not exactly your "hard news" lineup.
They were there for the same reason I was. Human Trafficking is a "hot" story, like Blackberrys and MySpace. The woman from People was practically drooling as she asked Alberto if he could help her "get in touch" with some of the victims. "We've been trying to get a victim for a long time," she said. Ah, People. In what other magazine can you learn Britney Spears loves K-Fed soooo much and also read about a sexually abused illegal immigrant? What was Glamour's angle... "This month, we give a victim of human trafficking a makeover she'll never forget!!!"?
The other reporters were all women. Alberto entered and said, "Welcome Ladies." Then he saw me. A few seconds passed. "And gentleman."
In this intimate setting, Alberto sat across from me at the conference room table. From my vantage point, I observed a funny little mannerism.
Alberto does this thing with his hands. He rests his wrists on the table, and just sort of pushes out with his fingers while he's speaking:
Sometimes he thrusts downward instead of up.
The wrists never leave the table. At one point, he played with a napkin. Just a funny little quirk.
He mentioned his how being a Mexican-American made the issue of Human Trafficking especially important to him. A large number of women are lured into the states from Mexico. Apparently, this is a growing problem that the government is taking seriously. Alberto seemed sincere when he said this was a priority of the administration. Where it ranks compared to the war in Iraq, the war in Afghanistan, Hurricane relief and banning gay marriage, he didn't say. But I find it hard to hate on Alberto. He was quiet and unassuming, shook hands with everybody, answered most of our questions (although he said he'd have to get back to me on how the government is supporting non-governmental organizations dedicated to fighting human trafficking)
Now you're probably wondering. Did you hit him with any hard questions? Did you reem him out for defending the policies of torture and unaccountable spying?
Well. No. I couldn't. For the sole reason that I was there representing a magazine, and the magazine has no political interests. So it would have been unprofessional to go off topic. Fun, but unprofessional.
He did say his priorities were to "Promote the American dream" and "Assure protection of civil rights." I have no reason to doubt him on this. He seemed sincere. He didn't say anything, however, about how torture and unauthorized spying play into those priorities.
Afterward, I called my mom. "The attorney general? Of the United States?" she said, surprised, when I called to tell her about my morning. "I thought you were meeting the attorney general of New York!"
"They don't send reporters from such prestigious news outlets as Glamour and Ladies Home Journal to cover the attorney general of New York, Mom," I said.
We'll have to wait and see which magazine writes the Human Trafficking "scoop" first. In the meantime, tell your impoverished friends in other countries that it may not be such a swell idea to take that guy up on his offer of free travel to the U.S. in exchange for some... services. And visit ijm.org to find out what you can do.
And please, give my MSNBC article a 5 dammit. I work hard for your sake. Don't be a hater!
One Lucky Customer
I've actually gone on a iTunes music buying spree these past couple weeks, because with every 100,000th song song, Apple was giving away free iPod Nanos. And for the billionth song sold, the buyer would receive ten iPods, a computer, $10,000 dollars worth of iTunes songs and even a college scholarship established in their name at Julliard.
Well, I didn't win.
Congrats to Alex Ostrofsky. Speed Of Sound, by Coldplay, was #1 billion. Which is good for Alex. Cause, seriously, what if he bought something really embarrassing. Ashlee Simpson? Chumbawumba? Billy Ray Cyrus? How'd you like that announced to the world? "And Alex won the prize by purchasing Aqua's 'Barbie Girl!'"
I'm actually relieved. Now I can start downloading JoJo again.
Hopefully Apple will do something like this for 2 billion, so I'll get another chance to win. In the meantime, I'm going back to Limewire.
I've actually gone on a iTunes music buying spree these past couple weeks, because with every 100,000th song song, Apple was giving away free iPod Nanos. And for the billionth song sold, the buyer would receive ten iPods, a computer, $10,000 dollars worth of iTunes songs and even a college scholarship established in their name at Julliard.
Well, I didn't win.
Congrats to Alex Ostrofsky. Speed Of Sound, by Coldplay, was #1 billion. Which is good for Alex. Cause, seriously, what if he bought something really embarrassing. Ashlee Simpson? Chumbawumba? Billy Ray Cyrus? How'd you like that announced to the world? "And Alex won the prize by purchasing Aqua's 'Barbie Girl!'"
I'm actually relieved. Now I can start downloading JoJo again.
Hopefully Apple will do something like this for 2 billion, so I'll get another chance to win. In the meantime, I'm going back to Limewire.
Monday, February 13, 2006
Sharp Shooter
Dick Cheney will go down in history. Although probably not the way he wanted to.
He becomes only the second Vice President to shoot somebody after being elected to office.
The first, Aaron Burr, famously shot and killed Alexander Hamilton in a duel after Hamilton blocked him from becoming President.
Ironically, a Newsweek article compared Cheney to Burr a little less than two years ago:
White House Formula For News:
Possibly thwarting a terrorist plot two years ago = NEWS
The Vice-President shoots somebody = Eh.
What will happen to Cheney?
Burr became an outcast from society after shooting Hamilton. He even tried to create an independent nation with himself as President somewhere out in the Louisiana purchase. He became one of the great villains of American history.
Well, Cheney's got that last one covered.
UPDATE: Ha Ha! I Shot Somebody! White House Laughs it up as Cheney Victim has heart attack.
Dick Cheney will go down in history. Although probably not the way he wanted to.
He becomes only the second Vice President to shoot somebody after being elected to office.
The first, Aaron Burr, famously shot and killed Alexander Hamilton in a duel after Hamilton blocked him from becoming President.
Ironically, a Newsweek article compared Cheney to Burr a little less than two years ago:
There's a reason why Burr remains such a hated figure. Just look at the reprobate's resume: 1776: George Washington hates him so much that he banishes him from his staff. 1800: He runs as Thomas Jefferson's vice president, but then tries to get the House of Representatives to make him president when the two of them tie the electoral vote (not even Joe Lieberman would have done that). 1804: He shoots Hamilton. 1807: He conspires to break off a chunk of the Louisiana Purchase and declare himself the ruler. 1865: He kills Abraham Lincoln. 1939: He invades Poland. 1972: He breaks into Democratic Party headquarters and then covers it up. 2004: He pulls aside a senator from Vermont and tells him, "Go f—- yourself." See? This is a bad man.Of course, Cheney shot his hunting pal by accident. Or so the story goes. Still, the Cheney staff didn't think the Vice President shooting somebody was "news" until the next morning.
White House Formula For News:
Possibly thwarting a terrorist plot two years ago = NEWS
The Vice-President shoots somebody = Eh.
What will happen to Cheney?
Burr became an outcast from society after shooting Hamilton. He even tried to create an independent nation with himself as President somewhere out in the Louisiana purchase. He became one of the great villains of American history.
Well, Cheney's got that last one covered.
UPDATE: Ha Ha! I Shot Somebody! White House Laughs it up as Cheney Victim has heart attack.
Saturday, February 11, 2006
Well, I Called It
It doesn't get more entertaining than tonight's opening ceremonies.
One reason I love the Olympics is Bob Costas. He's really the best. I cannot say this more heterosexually: I love the guy.
First off, he knows his stuff. You know he isn't reading this shit off a teleprompter. He just knows it.
When the parade of nations began, I was pretty sure I heard "Celebrate," the reknowned bar-mitzvah song. But I thought I had to be mistaken. This was the parade of nations! Not Pheobes on 80's night.
But then I heard "I Will Survive."
Thats when I started taking notes:
It doesn't get more entertaining than tonight's opening ceremonies.
One reason I love the Olympics is Bob Costas. He's really the best. I cannot say this more heterosexually: I love the guy.
First off, he knows his stuff. You know he isn't reading this shit off a teleprompter. He just knows it.
When the parade of nations began, I was pretty sure I heard "Celebrate," the reknowned bar-mitzvah song. But I thought I had to be mistaken. This was the parade of nations! Not Pheobes on 80's night.
But then I heard "I Will Survive."
Thats when I started taking notes:
Brian Williams pointed out the unique dresses all the sign holders wore. They were shaped like the alps. That's some Olympic style that has to be incorporated into the mainstream.
There's something a little bit wrong about Bosnia entering to the song "Freak Out!" But perhaps more appropriate than "I Will Survive."
Speaking of Olympic style: Mark My Words: Those Mongolian Hats Are Hot And Will Be HUUUUGE
As I watched I really was overcome by these small nations that struggle to even get to the games, much less compete in them. In one poor country, the villages collected money just to get their team to Torino. I want every small nation to win.
Video Killed The Radio Star!!!! This is getting out of hand!
Sign of the Zodiac??? I don't even remember that song! They're playing obscure 80's hits now???
This is why I love Costas and Williams:
"If I hear Betty ----, I'm gonna"
Brian Williams: "Donna Summers did it for me."
10:24 PM: I still hate the Russians.
Frozen Guy Commercial????? Chevy? What the hell....
That is one hot girl from Serbia and Montenegro. Looks a bit like Katarina Witt. That rhymes sorta.
Costas has so much information. I bet you he's not reading any of this off a teleprompter.... oh I already said this.
10:29 PM- Y M C A ! ! ! ! !
Costas: "And what tour of American Pop Music from the 80's would be complete without the village people?"
Costas gets mad, "You think the nation of Denmark requested this!?"
10:30 PM- Costas has had enough of this shit.
I wish I had Tivo.
10:31 PM- U.S.A.!!! U.S.A.!!!
10:32 PM- B O D E
10:36 PM- Weird McDonalds Ad. Kid looks like Ronald McDonald, sits next to him on a park bench. Disturbing.
10:43 PM- Burn Baby Burn!!!!?!?! Who's DJaying this shit? Unique Musique?
The Italians get trumpets... oh wait, its electronic. Somne Italian pop song.
10:46 PM- MILF Alert! That is one Italian hottie.
10:55 PM- Costas is a genius, possibly the smartest man on the planet. The female commentator? "The Renaissance was in the 14th century." REEEAAALLLY??
11:03 PM- Costas calls it: "We've never seen Ferraris at the opening ceremonies before."
Susan Sarandon! The Republicans are not going to like this.
Weird Climby Guys Forming A Dove sort of look like little snowflakes.
Is that Yoko Ono reading the peace poem??? To Disney music?
Imagine! As sung by Peter Gabriel!!! I'm beginning to think VH1 is responsible for this opening ceremony.
Actually, this is a great version. I will iTunes the shit out of it.
All the athletes swaying, all singing the same song. That is a beautiful sight that's got to give you a lot of hope for humanity.
Dude, during the commercial, I realize MSNBC and Yahoo have already published accounts of what happened. Isn't that cheating? I hate tape delay.
Irony, Alberto Tomba, who enters with the torch, is nicknamed "La Bamba"
Williams: "Who actually lights the torch is a best kept secret." Except we already know who did it.
Debra Campononi, very cute.
And it's lit! Nice fireworks.
Final surprise?
Ahh! Pavarotti! You can't have an Italian opening ceremony without opera.
I can see the headlines now: Ceremonies Over After Fat Man Sings
Well. Anyways, awesome ceremony. Now to play some Madden.
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