The End Of The World



Apparently, the greatest danger to human life on this planet is... super-intelligent ROBOTS??

How To Lose A Planet In Ten Ways

I, on the other hand, am much more afraid of the threat posed to us by ZOMBIES

I've Been Obsessed With This For A Week

I've been to San Francisco, Seattle, Miami Beach and Washington D.C. I've toured the unspoiled coastline of southern California, and checked out the Cohen residence in the O.C. I've seen glaciers in Alaska and witnessed for myself the oddity that is Area 51. I've raced down the interstate, heading south for the border, watching the farms and truck stops fly by. I've stopped by my former girlfriends' houses, gone back to my old camp, and took a spin around my old high school-- without being seen as one of those "weird kids" who still hangs out around his old high school.

All in one day.

All without leaving my chair.

How was it possible? A new time machine/teleportation device?

No.

Google.

Google Maps, to be precise. Google Satellite Maps, to be even more precise. Its the biggest time waster since Snood, and I've been touring the country, dropping in on unsuspecting friends' houses, and imagining statewide car chases ever since I discovered it.

Click this, then click "satellite" Enjoy

Here's a list of some landmarks you can check out. Also, proof I'm not the only one obsessed with this: Points of Interest

My neighborhood: Wayside,NJ

My high school: Pennington

My summers: Bradley Beach

My buddy's house??! Yikes! I can't believe he has a wife and a dog and... ok..: A J

Where I played Little League: Colt Field

Very Few People Know why this place means something to me: Those that do, don't tell!

Where the Rich People Live, Part I: Deal, NJ

Where the Rich People Live, Part II: Rumson, NJ

My Mall Is Huge!!: Monmouth Mall

Where I Live Now: Sty Town Baby!!!

The ex: I think...

I knew there was a secret government facility nearby!!!: Whats with the black square?

The Other Mall: They Have A Value City!!! (Note: Actually, there is no mall anymore, its an Applebees and a Target

My Elementary School: Its name? WAYSIDE SCHOOL. As in, the book Wayside School Is Falling Down. As you can see, not nearly as exciting as the book.

My Camp: Sexplo? Oh the memories

Where I Spent My Thanksgivings: The Concord The Best Of Times... may it rest in peace.

It Even Looks Fun From Space: Six Flags Great Adventure!!! Zoom in for a closer look. Don't you wish you could see the babboons in the safari park??

Look how pretty!!: Jersey City, Polka Dots USA

Fuck the Terrorists: Where's Bin Laden?

You can't see the vomiting post-prom kids from space: Part I: Wildwood

You can't see the vomiting post-prom kids from space: Part II: Seaside Heights

Speaking of Space: A Space Shuttle, a Rocket, and More!!!

Mysteries!!!!

Weird stuff I found:

Somewhere, near, in Boston: A giant marble?

In the desert in Utah: Somebody Burn a hole in the map?

Aliens?: Area 51

Ok, thats it for now. Yeah, I know, I have way too much time on my hands. Sad thing is, I'm at work. (just kidding, employers)

Yee-haww Florida!

Ever wanna shoot someone first and ask questions later?

Well the state of Florida, home to the nation's largest population with failing eyesight, is about to approve a bill saying that you can shoot just about anybody you perceive as threatening.

KKK Member: I didn't want to shoot him officer, but he was just so black, I was scaaarrrred.

Officer: That's ok, it's perfectly understandable.

Read the article here: Florida Loves Guns

It's funny, Jeb Bush loves life so much, he'll step in to save Terri Schiavo and approve gun-toting maniac legislation within a span of a couple weeks. Only in America, right?

Shoot first, ask questions later.

Now that's "erring on the side of life."

The Buck Stops... Somewhere Else?

Those prisoner abuses?

Some wayward soliders' fault. Certainly not a result of a Bush and Alberto Gonzales endorsed memo saying torture is, in the words of Tony the Tiger, "Grrrr-eat!"

Those missing tons of explosives in Iraq?

Blame the insurgents. Even though we knew about the stockpiles before even going into Iraq, and could have sent people to secure them.

9/11?

A CIA failure. Nevermind that Bush received a memo FROM THE CIA saying that Bin Laden was determined to strike in the U.S., and soon.

The Infamous Terri Schiavo memo? The one that said Terri Schiavo "is a great political issue ... and a tough issue for Democrats... This is an important moral issue and the pro-life base will be excited that the Senate is debating this important issue."-- proving that the Republicans only used Terri as a political football???

CNN- Sen. Mel Martinez said Wednesday an infamous unsigned memo passed around on Capitol Hill emphasizing the politics of the Terri Schiavo case originated in his office.

Martinez, R-Florida, said in a written statement that he discovered Wednesday that the memo had been written by an aide in his office.

"It is with profound disappointment and regret that I learned today that a senior member of my staff was unilaterally responsible for this document," Martinez said.

"Until this afternoon, I had never seen it and had no idea a copy of it had ever been in my possession," Martinez said of the document. He had previously denied knowing anything about the memo and condemned its sentiments.

Martinez, in his statement, said Sen. Tom Harkin, D-Iowa, had asked for background information on the bill ordering a federal court to review the Schiavo case.

He said he pulled a one-page document from his coat pocket and handed to Harkin. "Unbeknownst to me ... I had given him a copy of the now infamous memo."

He said Harkin had called him earlier Wednesday to say he believes the memo had been given to him by Martinez. The Florida senator said he then ordered an internal investigation in his office.

So... Martinez gave Harkin the memo... but didn't know what it was, who had written it, or what it said?

This guy's a senator???

Passing the buck. Republicans love it.

The Cult of Bush

Still recovering from last night's amazing concert. Chris ripped it. Check out his site at http://homepages.nyu.edu/~ctb210.

Jeanette Walls, Gossip columnist for MSNBC, writes this today:

Florida Governor Jeb Bush raised eyebrows among the critics of the sometimes controversial religion recently when he honored Scientology volunteers who helped victims of hurricanes in his state.

Members of the group, which was put in the spotlight this week by the New York Daily News for its alleged anti-homosexual philosophy, were given a Points of Light Award as Hurricane Heroes. Scientology volunteers have been high profile at disaster scenes recently, distributing food and water, as well as delivering controversial touch assist healings that supposedly help victims through the laying on of hands.

"The Bush brothers have both been good to some groups that have been called cults," says Rick Ross of CultNews.com. "Governor Bush has recognized Scientology while his brother in the White House has actually appointed a follower of Reverend Moon [David Caprara] to dole out tax payer money through the so-called faith-based initiative. Seems to me like the fox guarding the henhouse."

For those not familiar with the religion of John Travolta and Tom Cruise, you might want to check out their profile on the University of Virgina's Cult Website. Here are some highlights:

As Scientologists progress up the Bridge, they learn the details of Hubbard's cosmology, which articulates a many-trillion-year history similar to the "galactic space opera" of Hubbard's prolific science-fiction efforts.

Few other groups have been investigated and accused of wrongdoing at various times by so many government agencies (including the Internal Revenue Service, the Food and Drug Administration, and the Federal Bureau of Investigation).

"The head of the Galactic Federation (76 planets around larger stars visible from here) (founded 5,000,000 years ago, very space opera) solved overpopulation (250 billion or so per planet, 178 billion on average) by mass implanting. He caused people to be brought to Teegeeack (Earth) and put an H-Bomb on the principal volcanoes (Incident II) and then the Pacific area ones were taken in boxes to Hawaii and the Atlantic area ones to Las Palmas and there "packaged".

His name was Xenu. He used renegades. Various misleading data by means of circuits etc. was placed in the implants. (etc...)

But ok, Jeb praising a bunch of loonies isn't huge. George W. Bush appointing moonies to his "faith based initiatives" task force is.

Rev. Moon, of course, as all Unification Church people know, is the messiah. The fact that one of his followers oversees "faith based initiatives" is a little bit, well, unsettling. So is this info, from the UVA site:

The Unification Church has control of a vast financial empire. It owns many businesses, some of which appear to be in business to make money, while others appear to be in business to promote other objectives of the Church. For example, David Bromley cites several Korean businesses which have fared well. However, he also discusses the case of the Washington Times, the largest conservative newspaper in the nation's capital, which has consistently lost a large amount of money. The profitable Korean and Japanese businesses certainly provide some of the money to cover the losses of many American businesses, but it is uncertain just how successful these businesses are on the whole. It appears that the Unification Church operates the Washington Times not in order to make money, but instead to establish connections with people in power in Washington (Bromley:258-262). In this regard, the endeavor has been quite successful. This is part of a larger movement by the Church to spread its dollars to various organizations and causes in order to gain influence and obtain legitimacy. Those who have received money from the Unification Church include evangelicals and political conservatives (Bromley:265-267).

The Unification Church has been viewed as a cult in both Korea and the United States, and it is pursuing legitimacy vigorously. Reverend Moon hopes to gain friends in high places so that his movement might be recognized more broadly as a legitimate religious organization. His spending of money to back right wing politics has paid dividends in making many friends among those groups. George Bush has even spoken at Unification Church events (Responses to Questions on Unificationism on the Internet - Volume 31, Last Visited: May 4, 1999).

Some organizations sponsored by conservative evangelicals which have received money from Moon face a dilemma in that many of them desire Moon's money but have no qualms rejecting his doctrines as heretical and labeling his group as a dangerous and destructive cult. The Unification Church even promotes the books of some of these evangelicals like Dr. James Dobson and Tim and Beverly LaHaye (HSA Books. Books of Interest, Last Visited: May 4, 1999).

The Washington Times, of course, endorsed Bush. Little did I know, it was not only a conservative newspaper, but a Moonie one.

Is Bush a Moonie? Perhaps not. But he is a President that clearly embraces religious fanatics-- even if they're from cults.

The Branch Dividians just showed up a few years too early. Nowadays they'd be invited to White House dinners.

What's next? David Koresh for attorney general?

Oh Xenu, help us!