Friday, August 25, 2006

Shmucks For Jesus

Comedian Jackie Mason is suing the religious cult "Jews For Jesus" because they used his name and picture in a brochure attempting to lure people into joining their wacko group.

Apparently, the brochure shows an image of Jackie next to the question, "Jackie Mason, A Jew For Jesus?" Nowhere in the pamphlet does it give the answer--"No."

Needless to say, Mason was a bit taken aback.

"Everyone knows, I am as Jewish as a matzo ball or kosher salami," the comedian said.

Not surprisingly, the delusional cult doesn't see what the big deal is. So what if they implied a proud Jew is in fact a Jew For Jesus? What's wrong with fudging the religion of someone in order to fool other people into joining a spurious religious order?

"Shame on him for getting so upset about this," said the Christian spokeswom... I mean Jews For Jesus spokeswoman. "We claimed the Dalai Lama was a Jew for Jesus last week and he didn't complain."

(Note, the second part of that quote may have been merely implied.)

In other news, New York City officials responded to yesterday's Adam's Life blog post, urging CBS to drop Survivor: Race War from their schedule.

In a statement, CBS said that while they welcome debate on the issue, they don't give a shit.

"‘Survivor’ is a program that is no stranger to controversy," the statement said. Like, for example, the show had a naked guy on it once.

"It’s much safer to say, ‘No, let’s just stick with things the way they are. Let’s don’t be the network to rock the boat. Let’s not have “Survivor” try something new. But it's about time a reality show stood up to say, fuck this PC bullshit, I wanna see some black people and white people fight," said Johnny Shmobst, stunt double to Survivor host Jeff Probst. "I just don't see why people are offended by splitting people of different races into camps and getting rid of the weaker ones in elimination ceremonies." He also said that this year, instead of at a campfire, those ceremonies will be held in specially designed shower stalls. "It adds to the suspense," Shmobst said. He then laughed crazily, combusted into a fireball and disappeared.

1 comment:

Chad said...

Jackie Mason Charges Against Jews For Jesus Denied By U.S. District Court

A decision by U.S. District Judge Richard M. Berman was reached today in the United States District Court, Southern District of New York denying a preliminary injunction to Mr. Jackie Mason who sought to stop the distribution of one of the Jews for Jesus gospel pamphlets, entitled, "Jackie Mason, A Jew for Jesus?!"

In the eleven-page finding the Judge ruled that the pamphlet was protected speech under the First Amendment of the U.S. Constitution. Religious pamphlets with pop culture themes like the Mason one have been freely distributed by the organization for over 34 years and while this is a small win for Jews for Jesus, it is a big victory for gospel protected speech.

Judge Berman also addressed the two other contentions in the Mason injunction and could not find merit in them, ruling that a reader of the pamphlet could reasonably see that Jews for Jesus was not asserting that Jackie Mason was a Jew for Jesus and that the Jews for Jesus did not look to gain any commercial benefit from the pamphlet.

David Brickner, executive director of Jews for Jesus, said ‚"We never intended to hurt Jackie Mason's feelings. To many of us Jews for Jesus, Jackie Mason is an icon who reminds us of our Yiddish-speaking grandfathers. We appreciate his good-natured humor. We thought that he would appreciate ours and were surprised by this lawsuit. Nevertheless we felt we had to defend ourselves and are gratified by the court's decision upholding our 1st amendment rights. It is our hope that this can now be ended amicably." A further court date is scheduled for November 16th.

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