Thursday, March 03, 2011

A Radical Idea... Blow Up The NFL


They may still call baseball "America's Pastime," but the truth is, football is king in this country. The NFL has been wildly successful in fielding the sport and making it a year-round obsession for fans. From the draft in April to the Superbowl in February, it's football that produces the biggest parties, tailgates, and crowds.

But if the NFL and the NFL Players Association don't agree to extend the collective bargaining agreement deadline by midnight tonight, it may be time to consider a radical option.

End the NFL.

I'm not talking about the end of professional football. What I'm talking about is a passing of the torch-- from 32 owners who don't give a damn about fans or players, to 32 new owners who would respect the fans and instantly agree to adopt the previous collective bargaining agreement that has made football the most successful and financially sound league of all American sports.

A de-certification of the players union and a lengthy lockout from the NFL owners would effectively put the NFL "out of business," transforming every NFL player into a free agent, at liberty to bring their talents anywhere. The UFL and CFL have struggled to grab a foothold in the American football market for quite some time now... could they take advantage and create a new American football league?

Already, posters on UFL message boards are drooling at the prospect.

At issue is this: do you believe it's the NFL executives and owners that make the NFL so great, or the players?

Certainly, a new league or expanded UFL/CFL would undergo growing pains. You don't go from a second-class outfit to "the big leagues" overnight. But NFL-caliber talent attracts NFL-caliber dollars. What would happen if Coach Bill, Tom Brady and the rest of his New England Patriots teammates decided to all join the Hartford Colonials? Would all those Patriots fans stick with Bob Kraft? Or would they throw on "New England Colonials" jerseys? I'd say the latter. Other teams can follow suit, joining existing UFL/CFL teams or new expansion teams, headed by investors who have been itching for a piece of the NFL pie for years. There's plenty of places to play football other than NFL-owned stadiums. How about the Lions playing in Michigan Stadium? They'd probably have MORE fans fill the seats there than currently do at Pontiac.

Of course, players wouldn't be bound to stay with their previous squads. What if a group of Pro Bowlers decided they wanted to start a team in South Beach, ala LeBron and company? Forget about the sad sack Miami Dolphins, welcome to the juggernaut Miami Sharks.

Coach Pacino

Certainly, ticket sales, a tv deal,and a wave of new merchandise would all raise money for the fledgling league and help pay salaries. The UFL today pays their players a pittance... but only because the league earns a pittance. With legions of football fans having nowhere else to turn, a new league would have a market of hungry fans willing to spend the money they once spent on the NFL.

No, it's not likely. But why are we trusting 32 people with a sport we love? Especially when they've shown they value money over the sport itself?

Friday, February 25, 2011

Attention-Grabbing Facebook Ads

Is that... a monkey???


I'm not sure what that monkey is doing with that bikini-clad babe at the pool, but I'm fairly sure clicking the link won't help me find out...

...

...

I clicked it. I was right. No relief to be had for my curiosity. Damn you Facebook Ads!!!

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

The Facebook Effect: Tunisia, Egypt and The Oscars


In 2003, President George Bush had a theory he thought would change the world. How much of the theory was actually his and not Dick Cheney's and his neocon buddies' is up for debate, but the gist of the idea was this: Get rid of Saddam Hussein, establish democracy in Iraq, and the rest of the Middle East would fall into freedom like a cascade of dominoes.

In 2011, we're seeing the Middle East falling into freedom like a cascade of dominoes. Huzzah! Were Bush and Cheney, gasp, actually right??

Well, yes and no. They were right about one thing: freedom is contagious. It's common sense, really. If your hard-earned money is being taxed, then you're funding your government. And if your government treats you like a slave, that breeds resentment. Freedom is the logical desire: the hope that your efforts will provide you, and not the members of your government, with a better life. The hope that one day, nothing will stand in the way of your happiness.

It makes sense that if the yoke of autocratic rule is thrown off in a country where that hope once seemed impossible--those elsewhere who similarly seek freedom will be encouraged to take action.

Autocrats rule by making their people believe that freedom isn't for them. They stay in power by making their people fear that without an iron fist, anarchy will take over. Once that illusion is dispelled, there's nothing left to hold back the floodgates of democracy.

But the Cheney-Bush Middle East domino theory was wrong, catastrophically wrong, about the agent of change. They believed military intervention would be the driver behind a people's revolution. According to them, the people would only rise up if they knew they had the backing of a superpower, the United States. Without military assistance from abroad, the people would be too scared to turn on their leaders.

We've recently seen otherwise. The revolutions in Tunisia and Egypt (and possibly elsewhere... Iran and Saudi Arabia being next in line), were not precipitated by the U.S. military intervention in Iraq and Afghanistan. Instead, they were sparked by another idea that developed in 2003.

Facebook.

From The New York Times:

After a strike that March in the city of Mahalla, Egypt, Mr. Maher and his friends called for a nationwide general strike for April 6. To promote it, they set up a Facebook group that became the nexus of their movement, which they were determined to keep independent from any of the established political groups. Bad weather turned the strike into a nonevent in most places, but in Mahalla a demonstration by the workers’ families led to a violent police crackdown — the first major labor confrontation in years.

Just a few months later, after a strike in Tunisia, a group of young online organizers followed the same model, setting up what became the Progressive Youth of Tunisia. The organizers in both countries began exchanging their experiences over Facebook. The Tunisians faced a more pervasive police state than the Egyptians, with less latitude for blogging or press freedom, but their trade unions were stronger and more independent. “We shared our experience with strikes and blogging,” Mr. Maher recalled...

After the Tunisian revolution on Jan. 14, the April 6 Youth Movement saw an opportunity to turn its little-noticed annual protest on Police Day — the Jan. 25 holiday that celebrates a police revolt that was suppressed by the British — into a much bigger event. Mr. Ghonim used the Facebook site to mobilize support. If at least 50,000 people committed to turn out that day, the site suggested, the protest could be held. More than 100,000 signed up.

“I have never seen a revolution that was preannounced before,” Mr. Ghonim said.

In Tunisia and Egypt, where the rights to public assembly were severely restricted, and free speech non-existent, Facebook became the logical place to organize and assemble a protest.

The youthful leaders of the respective opposition movements each took advantage of Facebook's age gap-- it's unlikely that Mubarak or Ben Ali were checking their Facebook newsfeeds or that their secret police even took note of the myriad Facebook groups dedicated to ousting their regimes. It's likely that Mubarak and Ben Ali, if they even thought about Facebook at all, thought about it like some harmless fad, a method that the youth of the nation used to share pictures and post baby bunny videos.

They soon discovered, however, that Facebook could be a powerful force. By bringing together people and their social networks, information could fly fast and unfiltered among dozens, hundreds, thousands of people at once. Dictators like Ben Ali and Mubarak relied on control of information to control their people. Facebook subverted that control, providing a conduit for mass communication that flowed free of government censors.

Freedom is contagious. But it didn't spread through military intervention. It's spreading through technological innovation.

In Apple's famous 1984 Macintosh TV spot, a hammer thrower shatters the Big Brother image lording over a population of slaves:



Twenty-seven years later, we're seeing the fulfillment of that promise: technology destroying totalitarian control. Apple is part of that-- leading the way with mobile devices that allow people access to information anywhere. Google is part of that too, bringing together facts and information from all perspectives and corners of the Earth-- it shouldn't surprise us that an Egyptian Google executive would be such an integral part of the Egyptian uprising.

Facebook completes the freedom-fighter's toolkit, providing a digital gathering place, a way to show people dreaming of a better tomorrow that they're not only not alone, but part of the majority.

Bush's military policy removed Hussein and the Taliban from power, but it didn't empower the people of Iraq and Afghanistan. Their revolution was stolen from them. Instead of rising up and grabbing control of their country, someone else grabbed it for them. And as a result, they got neither the leadership nor the constitution they wanted. They got... "America, F*ck Yeah!"

The wars in Iraq and Afghanistan left the people feeling powerless and helpless, dependent on a foreign nation for all their daily needs. All at the cost of billions of American dollars and thousands of American lives.

Of course, the inability to see the future is a condition shared by more people than just Bush and Cheney. In 2003, not even Mark Zuckerberg (and the Winklevoss twins) could have known that social networking would step into a pretty major global role as a real-world action driver. But what if? What if we had the patience not to go to war?

Would the regimes of Iraq and Afghanistan have fallen on their own, as their populations became more digitally connected? Or were their technological infrastructures so primitive that the world of Facebook would have been inaccessible to them, even eight years later?

These questions aren't addressed, or even hinted at in the blockbuster film, The Social Network, about the origins of Facebook. I liked the film, but the movie reduces Facebook to a hookup engine... one reason, I suspect, that Mark Zuckerberg wasn't its biggest fan. But one can't blame the writers and producers. The truth is, our awareness of the power of Facebook has only recently been heightened, by its use in Tunisia and Egypt, and its influence in the Tea Party movement of our own country. The true utilities of Facebook's social network have yet to be fully explored.

If Facebook can spark a democratic revolution in a place where such a thing seemed impossible... then are there any limits the the change it can ferment in the world?

Is Facebook the new military intervention?

Is Facebook... world peace???

If The Social Newtork wins an Oscar, it won't win it for what was depicted on screen: a vapid tale of success at all costs. It will win because the members of the Academy and all the rest of us know--even while we're posting stupid status updates and links to Justin Bieber videos--that Facebook isn't just a website, it's become something inextricable from our lives.

The future of the human race has always relied on the evolution of our communications. Our planet is a large one, and our experiences on it are diverse. The closer we can come together and the stronger the lines that connect us, the more difficult it will be for us to fall apart. Once upon a time, communiques sent by flaming beacons and carrier pigeons helped end wars. It's foolish to think of Facebook and WiFi as anything less than the latest in a series of innovations that will help transform the world into a better place.

Perhaps instead of sending armies to remove dictators, we should be sending routers and iPhones.

We're seeing the power of technology at work right now. In a cascade of dominoes set off not by a gun, but by the Like button.

Monday, January 24, 2011

Did The Steelers Cheat?

The Jets should have beat the Steelers yesterday. Even despite that terrible first half. If they hadn't of absolutely called the worst possible plays when inside the Steelers 5-yard line, we might be talking about a Jets Superbowl right now.

But the play calling wasn't the only issue on the pivotal drive that ended in no points instead of a TD for the Jets (one play later, they added a safety, but it was too little, too late).

According to the Daily News:
"As Sanchez was waiting for the call from Schottenheimer on second down, he said the radio in his helmet had gone haywire, something the QB said he had to deal with all night. Why wasn't it fixed? It's happened in other games, Sanchez said, but never for that long. He kept pointing to his helmet as the 40-second play clock was working its way down.

"The problem was the headset kept going out multiple times during the game," Sanchez said. "I had to run over and get a couple of calls, piece together some calls in the headset that came in broken up. It's just one of those things that we were fighting through and I was proud of our guys for trying to piece it together."

At one point during the game, the Jets had to use a walkie-talkie. This time, at this crucial moment, Sanchez ran over toward the sidelines. Schottenheimer met him halfway on the field and gave him the call with about 18 seconds on the play clock. Sanchez hustled to the huddle and quickly called the play, the 40-second clock winding down toward zero. The Jets, in what would be their most important series of the year, rushed to the line. Sanchez didn't want to use the Jets' first timeout of the second half, knowing it would be valuable later on. Nick Mangold snapped the ball just before the play clock expired."

According to ESPN:
"The primary headset used to communicate with the quarterback went out after the first possession, and the backup unit stopped functioning in the fourth quarter as the Jets were attempting to convert on a first-and-goal from the Steelers' 2 with roughly eight minutes left in the game and down 24-10."

The result from all these headset issues? 4 and out, many, many precious seconds ticked off from the clock.

Maybe that's why Jets coach Rex Ryan took out his rage on his headset:



However, more than one Jets fan has speculated that the headset issues may not have been an innocent quirk of technology:


I investigated to see whether this thing has ever helped the Steelers win a game before...

It hasn't.

Sorry Jets fans. Unless a Steelers' employee slips up and admits subterfuge, we're all gonna have to blame this on Schottenheimer and some faulty headsets.

And, as my high school friend Jin points out, a Jets-Steelers trade that up until the final seconds, seemed to be in the Jets favor:

"Santonio holmes was traded to jets for 5th round pick, that 5th round pick was then traded to cardinals for mcfadden pluz a 6th round pick..... guess who that 6th round pick was.... antonio brown, the guy caught the last pass on 3rd and 6 to beat who? the jets! funny how things works out, not such a bad trade after all."

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Fountain Lady Has Lawyer, But Absolutely No Case

This video is hilarious:



This video is sad: "Fountain Lady" Ponders Lawsuit

The original video posted on YouTube did not identify the woman, and the resolution of the tape is insufficient to identify the woman either. The only reason the woman was identified was because she identified herself as the bumbling texter, gave interviews to newspapers and went on television.

So did the video cause her humiliation? Or did she?

She also claims no one came to her aid. As is apparent in the video, not many people saw her. Only one person in the video can be seen looking directly at the incident... and he approaches the woman to ask if she's alright.

The woman got up and out of the fountain swiftly. She didn't appear injured, just embarrassed. Was this something mall security really had to respond to? This seems like something that's not part of their job description.

But now of course, she's planning to sue.

Given the video evidence, she'd fail in court. The threatened lawsuit is simply a ploy to extract a settlement from a mall owner who probably won't want to spend the money to lawyer up. The woman's lawyer is betting they'll settle for a sum less than potential lawyer fees and court costs. Meanwhile, the woman's lawyer will get a percentage of the settlement and some free publicity for his practice.

The irony is, the woman could have spun this into considerably more money by NOT suing. She could have taken advantage of her comic pratfall, spinning it into ads for cell phone unlimited texting plans or one of those, "Wanna Get Away?" Southwest Airlines commercials. I mean, that crying Britney Spears guy made a few bucks, any YouTube viral star should be able to.

Now she's just another sad example of America's love affair with litigation.

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