Do No Harm

Excellent piece in the New York Times Magazine about the tragic and terrifying scenes that played out in a New Orleans hospital in the immediate wake of Hurricane Katrina. Harrowing.

I don't know what to think. All I know is it makes me angry. It seems to me that by euthanizing patients who had a chance at survival, however slim, goes against the Hippocratic oath, not to mention basic morality. The main doctor involved may insist she's not a murderer, but that just makes me more inclined to judge her harshly. What kind of person ends a life and displays no remorse for what they did, even if they believe it was necessary? What if it was your parent, brother, sister who was in that hospital bed? Would you still do it? What if it was you in that bed?

What makes it worse is that this woman is seeking to make doctors immune from prosecution for their actions during a disaster. If that bill were to pass, wouldn't it reduce incentive to save patients lives? They could just euthanize everybody and then get out of dodge. Does that seem right to you?

I'd take my chances with God rather than being the victim of some doctor who decided for me that I needed to die.

Smarter Than The Average Bear



In the High Peaks region of the northeastern Adirondacks, somebody's been stealing picnic baskets:

“She’s quite talented,” said Jamie Hogan, owner of BearVault [a bear-proof container manufacturer], based in San Diego. “I’m an engineer, and if one genius bear can do it, sooner or later there might be two genius bears.

Actually, there's already a second:


Sources Say His Name Is Boo Boo

The New York Times couldn't reach Ranger Smith for comment, apparently.

New York Times Spends Way Too Much Time Writing About Naked Five-Year-Olds

When Do They Need A Fig Leaf?

I'm not quite sure how naked kids running around became news that the Times just had to cover. All the news that's fit to print??

And Just Like That, There Was No More Elliot Spitzer


"Client 9"

He came into New York politics as a bright shining star, a beacon of hope amid the dirty world of crooked and morally bankrupt government officials. He'd brought corrupt corporations to their knees, prosecuted those who exploited the weak and the down-trodden. Some even believed him to be a future candidate for President. But today, Elliot Spitzer became just another disappointment in the ever-growing cadre of politicians who promised to be different, but ended up being all too familiar.

Elliot Spitzer, reformer, crusader, prostitute-lover.

The New York Times has reported that Spitzer has admitted his involvement in a high-class prostitution ring recently busted up by the feds:

The governor’s travel records show that he was in Washington in mid-February. One of the clients described in court papers arranged to meet with a prostitute who was part of the ring, the Emperors Club VIP on the night of Feb. 13.

Mr. Spitzer appeared on a CNBC television show at 7 a.m. the next morning. Later in the morning, he testified before a Congressional committee.

An affidavit filed in federal court in Manhattan in connection with that case lists six conversations between the man, identified as Client 9, and a booking agent for the Emperors Club.

Yes, the night before appearing in front of a congressional committee, the married father of three decided to get jiggy with a high-priced bimbo.

In recent days, Spitzer appeared ready to meet some of the lofty expectations New York residents had for him. Despite political in-fighting and legislative failures early on in his tenure, he had poised his party to win the state senate for the first time in decades. With a solidly Democratic senate in place, Spitzer would finally have no stumbling blocks standing in the way of his proposed reforms.

Now it seems, it was all for naught. If he is indeed "Client 9" from the Fed's affidavit, then Spitzer will undoubtedly be forced to resign from government. Not to mention, he will face jail time for a crime he once prosectuted others for.

How could someone at such a high level, who knew the consequences of what he was doing, commit such a foolish crime? Then again, haven't several government officials done the same thing? Maybe it's a side-effect of being elected.

The man once called "Elliot Ness" by the press, is in an "Elliot Mess."

Elliot Spitzer, in a statement this afternoon, apologized to his family and the public, stating, "I am disapointed that I failed to live up to the standard I had set for myself."

So are we, Elliot. So are we.

Killer Cats

The New York Times has an interesting article about wild cats decimating the bird population throughout the world, especially in island and seashore habitats. One bird lover took it upon himself to shoot the offending furballs.

"For the cats, it’s easy pickings. They’re popping birds like they were M & M’s." -cat shooter Jim Stevenson.

Here at Adam's Life, we believe cats are just like people (and dogs are just like really dumb people). As such, some are cute and cuddly, and others would make Ted Bundy afraid.

So I'm not sure shooting them is the answer. The guy who shot the cat didn't catch the cat in the act of eating a bird. How did he know that the cat he shot was one of the bad ones? Maybe that cat was just in the wrong place at the wrong time, lured to the bird's nesting grounds by some of his cat frat brothers, in some sort of cat hazing ritual. Maybe that cat just came to the bird nesting grounds because that's where all the hot female cats hung out. My point is, that poor cat was executed without due process. And that's just un-American.

So what do I propose? How do we solve the feral cat problem? Simple, my friends...

Cat jails.



Two "Cat Jail" Prototypes

In every municipality dealing with a feral cat problem, we set up special tribunals to try accused cats. Each cat will be assigned a public defender, and the prosecution will have to prove that the de-feline-dent actually committed a crime.

If convicted, the cat will receive a sentence anywhere from community service (forced to pick up trash along the highway) to life behind bars (I don't believe in the death penalty).

Now, I know what you're saying. This will cost taxpayers billions. It will make a mockery of the criminal justice system. Billions, you say? Well how much are we spending on the war?? A mockery of the criminal justice system? Um... hello, remember this?:


The System Doesn't Work

Cat jails will work as a deterrent, making feral cats think twice about attacking endangered birds. And they can pay for themselves... just charge admission to cat lovers, turning each cat jail into a sort of petting zoo.

The more I think about this, the more I'm convinced it will work. So write your congressman. Tell him you don't want another cent of your taxpayer dollars going towards the war, and you want it all directed towards cat jails. It's the only humane way to deal with this problem.