Apple's Blunder Not A Blunder... Yet

You've probably seen the flat Eiffel Tower, post-apocalyptic San Francisco, Brooklyn's new location in Manhattan (and vice versa), and other hilarious (or annoying, depending on your level of iPhone maps dependence) gaffes included in the new iOS 6 maps program. Apple's decision to replace Google Maps in their new iPhone operating system with.a far inferior navigational tool has caught a lot of heat, and for good reason.

But Apple's stock fell from the $700 dollar level to around $678 at recent trading, and already, some analysts are calling the fiasco "Apple's undoing."

Okay, let's hold up a second. This might not be so bad for Apple. Actually, it might work out quite well.

This is undeniably a hiccup in Apple's mobile dominance. Whether it's more than that depends on the next moves by Google and Apple...

1. Google's move. Clearly, Google has emerged a big winner from Apple's iPhone maps blunder. Like the locked out NFL referees, their value to the iPhone was largely taken for granted. It took Apple "locking Google out," for iPhone customers to recognize Google's superiority over "replacements." It goes beyond maps... Google is also responsible for the phone's default search capability and the algorithms that figure out from your typos and bad grammar what you really mean to look for. Before this episode, users rarely distinguished the built in Google apps from the iPhone package. Suddenly, the wonderful, amazing iPhone looks like a wonderful, amazing piece of hardware running some pretty wonderful, amazing Google apps.

And here is the advantage for Google: without Google Maps and other Google products on the iPhone, Android phones are suddenly much more attractive. The fact that these popular and useful services are available on Android phones could cause some users to switch, and attract new smartphone buyers. If GPS and getting around is a priority for you, you'd be hard-pressed to make a case for the iPhone's cribbed-from-GPS-devices-crica-1999 navigation quality.

Google could, in theory, not release its products to work on the iPhone, releasing them exclusively for Android.

However, indications are that Google is developing a Google Maps app to be available through the Apple App Store. A modest charge for these apps could potentially make up for the loss in licensing fees Apple used to pay them. Or the app could make money by being ad-supported, and we all know Google is the king of mobile advertising.

Either way, Google wins. If they hold onto Google maps for Android, they gain a marketing advantage. If they sell it through the Apple App Store, or offer the app with ads, they retain some marketing advantage (its free on Android, $$$ or ads on iPhone) while making money on the side.

2. Apple's move. Apple certainly could block Google's apps from the App Store. But doing so wouldn't provide any benefit for them. By shutting out Google, they'd be conceding a pretty big advantage to Android. Use the iOS maps for 5 minutes and argue that Apple is EVER going to catch up to Google. You can't. The "search" company has spent more than a decade and millions of dollars on development, and it's created the most up-to-date, most detailed digital representation of our world that's possible with current technology. Apple took out a dusty atlas and painted Salvador Dali images on it.

Also, Apple has nothing to lose by allowing the Google Maps app and other Google apps to be sold. Apple reaps a large percentage every time someone makes an App store purchase. In effect, instead of paying a licensing fee to Google... they can  now make money every time a Google app is sold.

As stated earlier, Google could offer a free app, supported by advertising. Apple wouldn't make any percentage from that. But they also wouldn't lose any marketing advantage to Android, and they still wouldn't need to pay Google a licensing fee. 

If this all goes according to plan, then really, the shift to those terrible Apple maps wasn't a blunder at all, but a calculated move to save money on licensing fees and possibly make more money by taking commission off of Google app sales.

The only way this doesn't work out for Apple is if Google withholds their apps exclusively for Android. But Google would have to calculate that the income raised by increased Android purchases would outweigh the money to be made by selling apps in the Apple App Store or selling advertising against a free app. Clearly, Google is developing an iOS app, so they've made their decision already.

"Apple's undoing?" Hardly. This blunder could end up being a money maker for both Apple and Google. In essence, its a more efficient way of getting the companies to work together, without pesky contracts and licensing fees littering the battleground.

Airline To Offer "Weep Warnings" To Passengers

Virgin Atlantic airlines announced today that they will flash "weep warnings" before the beginning of emotional films shown aboard their flights.

I could have used that before watching "Up" on one flight. I had to hide my tears from the hot chick next to me, and it wasn't easy.



Dammit, just cried again now watching this clip.

Thank you, Virgin Atlantic, for looking out for my tear ducts!

Of course, the weep warning system isn't quite perfected yet:

"The movies "Water For Elephants" and "Just Go With It" will be the first films to carry the warnings."

"Just Go With It?" Well, according to the reviews, I guess there's a chance you'll cry over the state of Adam Sandler's career.

Yankees Season Ticket Department Screws Up Again, This Time, Worse

Who the heck is running the show inside the Yankees Season Ticket Office?

For the second time in two years, an email was sent to hundreds of Yankees season ticket holders, revealing personal information to strangers. The first time the Yankees revealed personal information, it was only email addresses... someone used CC (not Sabathia) instead of BCC, a major mass-email no-no that exposed the personal email addresses of hundreds of people (and potential spammers). This time, the Yankees employee went even further, attaching a handy dandy spreadsheet of names, addresses, phone numbers, fax numbers and email addresses-- and the seats they have in Yankee Stadium.

Deadspin first reported the details on the Yankees season ticket holders privacy breach yesterday afternoon. More than 20,000 people were affected, all in non-premium seating-- which means that once again, the Yankees management has screwed the true, blue collar fans and pampered the wealthy people who never show up to games and keep the seats around the infield empty for the majority of the year.

A call to Ken Cleary, Account Executive of Season Ticket Sales & Services, went unanswered Thursday morning. But his email to those affected (including me) indicated that "immediately upon learning of the accidental attachment of the internal spreadsheet, remedial measures were undertaken so as to assure that a similar incident could not happen again."

I assume that would mean the idiot who did this was fired? Maybe not. The original email came from Ken, the same person who later blamed "an employee."

Of course, the personal information was revealed on Monday. It took until Wednesday for the Yankees to send an apology and acknowledgment of the mistake. This is actually better response time than the last time... where they never apologized at all.

Also disturbing, the "recall message" we received shows that whoever sent the email has a huge gap of understanding when it comes to using email. Once an email is sent, you ain't getting it back, buddy. Perhaps the Yankees should use Google's "Mail Goggles."

The things one could do with this list is troubling. It goes beyond spam. Let's say you were wondering who the hot blonde was in Seat 24, Row 11, Section 235. The list could tell you that. Already, my cousin and I are joking about greeting all the people in our row by name next time we go to the stadium.

It's not inconceivable that an enterprising person who wanted to upgrade their seats for the following season could call up the people who held their desired seats, and find out whether they're re-upping for next season. If they're not, they could circumvent the Yankees and arrange to transfer the tickets.

And that's not even getting into other potential abuses. Con artists looking to scam people out of their credit cards could pretend to be Yankees reps, calling people on the list. After all, they know their seat numbers, account codes... it would sound legit to an unwary ticket holder.

Thanks a lot Yankees. It was bad enough you stuck us with a package involving multiple Royals and Orioles games, including two weekday 1:00 games. Now this.

UPDATE (May 2): Got a call back from Mario Oliveri, Yankees Season Ticket account executive. He assured me that the Yankees take this seriously, but repeated the company line that "no information was released that can't be found on Google." Except, you know, unlisted telephone numbers, those seat numbers, and the Yankees account number. He said that they've updated their security procedures, securing spreadsheet files, and making sure they ask additional information from those calling in, like "what credit card did you use to make your purchase?" When I pointed out that a scammer could ask the same thing, Mario said that everybody is aware of the situation, so they're less likely to fall for a scam.

I was hoping they'd offer something, anything, to make up for their sloppy security and revealing information that people would rather not have distributed to thousands of others. A Yankees seat cushion? A free pen? But it seems the Yanks are content to ride this one out, and if they lose a customer or two, they're not too worried about it.

A Few Words On Branding

It's incredibly difficult to build a brand. For every Apple, Nike, and Coca-Cola, there's a million different failures that never attracted consumer recognition and loyalty. So its bizarre to find that in a bad economy, when every industry is struggling, established brands are spending millions of dollars to trash their brands and destroy their iconic symbols.

Take the Gap, which changed from their iconic blue box to... well, this universally-panned monstrosity:

Already, Gap has been forced to pretend this was all part of some social media experiment. Actually, Gap paid millions to a "creative agency" (which, ironically, touts the old logo on its website.)

We've seen this type of thing before. Remember when Tropicana lost its mind?


Yes, This Is More Generic!

Now, I know business is down these days. So I'm going to save the corporations of America a lot of money. Instead of these businesses needing to pay consulting firms and market research teams millions of dollars to redesign their beloved, iconic logos into horsetrash... I mean, "dynamic research driven graphic design paradigms," I'm going to perform this service for free. Eat your heart out Laird and Partners...

Yankees Employee Screws Up



A Yankees employee accidently clicked "CC" instead of "BCC" in a promotional email she sent to nearly 1,000 people. As a result, she revealed nearly 1000 email addresses to total strangers, some of whom, within minutes, were spamming the others on the list with offers for posters and ticket trades.

A quick rundown of the email addresses reveals people working at financial institutions, media companies, military installations and other places that would definitely not appreciate their work emails being broadcast to potentially unsavory characters.

A follow up email simply was an attempt to recall the message... I think we know how that worked out.

I'll accept an apology in the form of Legends Seats tickets.

Tropicana To Nation: "Whoops! We Goofed!"

After perplexing consumers for months with an ill-advised packaging switch that made their orange juice look crappy, Tropicana has reversed course and vowed to return to their original "orange and straw" carton.

Neil Campbell, president at Tropicana North America in Chicago said the company was responding to complaints from a loyal group of customers. "We underestimated the deep emotional bond" they had with the original packaging, he told the New York Times. "Those consumers are very important to us, so we responded."

As The New York Times pointed out:

Among those who underestimated that bond was Mr. Campbell himself. In an interview last month to discuss the new packaging, he said, “The straw and orange have been there for a long time, but people have not necessarily had a huge connection to them.”

Ooh, someone's got egg on their face!

You be the judge. Which screams "fresh squeezed orange juice not from concentrate?" A straw sticking into a whole, ripe, juicy orange? Or a glass filled with a pale yellowish liquid?


"Hey, I've Got A Great Idea! Let's Change An Iconic, Beloved Product!!!!"

Fortunately, Tropicana had the wisdom to recognize their horrendous error and fix it before much damage was done. But the whole gaffe raises an issue I've been thinking a lot about recently. The utter uselessness of focus groups and traditional "market testing" for new products in this Internet age.

The thinking behind Tropicana's "need for change" was boneheaded from the start. I wasn't there at the PepsiCo offices that day, but I can imagine the conversation went something like this:

Clueless CEO: In these tough times, we need to set ourselves apart from the other orange juice manufacturers out there. How do we do it?

Stooge #1: We need an O.J. spokesperson. Too bad there's no celebrity with the initials, O.J.

Stooge #2: When people hear "juice," they think "sticky and weird." What if we called it, "Orange Essence?"

Stooge #3: A new ad campaign! How about, "Orange you glad it's Tropicana?"

Clueless CEO: Good ideas, but I was thinking about making our juice stand out in the supermarket.

Stooge #4: Well, every orange juice out there has an orange on the front of the carton. What if we didn't have an orange on the front. What if we had a naked chick with oranges for boobs?

Clueless CEO: I love it, but our research shows more women than men buy orange juice.

Stooge #4: So put oranges instead of a guy's...

Stooge #1: How about just a glass of orange juice.

Clueless CEO: Just a glass?

Stooge #1: Like, who sticks a straw into an orange and takes a drink? I drink my orange juice from a glass.

Stooge #2: Me too!!

Stooge #4: I drink my orange juice from an Indian skull I dug up... but I like the idea.

Clueless CEO: It's settled then. Instead of our iconic, universally recognized orange and straw symbol, we'll go with a generic looking glass filled with a vague yellow-orange liquid.

All: Huzzah!!!! Huzzah!!!

Bad ideas start in corporate groupthink meetings, and they often get worse in focus groups, compiled of people who have the time to attend focus groups, who need the $20 or so stipend these focus groups pay, and who like the sound of their own voices.

Focus Group Leader: So, what do you think of the new carton?

Focus Group Guy: This is so awesome!

Focus Group Leader: The new package?

Focus Group Guy: No, the fact that I don't have a job that requires me to work during the day, and I can earn $20 making a bunch of corporate suits who hang on my every word do exactly what I say, even though I'm a complete idiot!

Focus Group Leader: So the carton?

Focus Group Guy: Can they make it a curvy glass, like a wine glass? That's classy!

Clueless CEO (behind one-way mirror): Brilliant!!!

In this Internet age, there's no reason for a focus group. If Coca-Cola had announced on the internet that it was considering dropping Coke and instead, making "New Coke," the internet would have put them in their place. All Tropicana needed to do was send a press release, or survey, out to the web (via bloggers or their own website), and they would have had instant feedback in minutes from people who cared enough to voice their opinions without being paid. They would have known that a glass of a vague yellow liquid is about the lamest brand symbol anyone's come up with since the logo design for the New York Mets CitiField:


Were They Even Trying?

The Internet provides instant access to millions of consumers, something that just about everybody has figured out by now. Why not use that medium as a testing ground for new ideas, BEFORE you waste time and money on an idea dreamed up by some guy who wouldn't know what creativity was even if they were roommates with Picasso, Woody Allen and Beck?

With that in mind, I've come up with a new logo for Adam's Life. I present it to you now for your opinion. If you guys like it, consider it this blog's new avatar:



I worked reeeeaaally hard on it.