Broken Gronk? Don't Believe It, Giants

Gronkowski wearing boot on lower left leg

Jan 23, 6:29 pm EST

FOXBOROUGH, Mass. (AP)—New England Patriots tight end Rob Gronkowski is wearing a removable boot on his lower left leg after being injured in the AFC championship game.

Gronkowski wore the boot as he walked through the locker room and into the trainer’s area on Monday. He did not speak with reporters.

The second-year star, who set an NFL record for a tight end with 17 touchdown catches, was hurt in the final minute of the third quarter of Sunday’s 23-20 win when he was tackled after a 23-yard reception. He limped off the field but seemed to be walking better as he went to the locker room. Less than five minutes later, Gronkowski was back in the game.

He finished with five catches for 87 yards.

Hmm... the key to the Patriots offense in a walking boot prior to the Superbowl against the Giants. Where have I heard this before??

Oh yeah: Broken Brady? Don't Believe It, Giants.

Last time these two teams met in the Superbowl, it ended with my friends and I parading through the Manhattan streets, shouting "18-1" into well-known Boston fan bars.

I'm hoping for a repeat.

Bill Simmons

An article like this is why Bill Simmons has become such a popular sportswriter. The guy writes like a sports fan. Like an educated sports fan. Reading this, you can't help but think it's the final word on this Bill-Belichick-going-for-it on-fourth-and-2-from-his-own-28-with-the-lead-late-in-the-game-vs-Indy-controversy. Can you argue with his logic?

Sure, if the Patriots make it, the game's over. But the game's probably over if they punt it too. By not punting, the game is definitely NOT over. In fact, it makes it pretty likely you lose.

Bellicheat sucks.

Who Is Matt Cassel?

This Sunday, for the first time since 2001, the New England Patriots will have someone other than Tom Brady under center for the start of a regular season game. Instead, fans will see Matt Cassel, a guy who is not dating Gisele, not the father of Bridget Moynahan's baby, and isn't constantly confused with Matt Damon.


Ignore The Man On The Left

Who exactly is this guy?

If you're a sports fan, or have even watched the news, you've probably heard that Cassel hasn't started a game since high school. You may even know he's married to a total hottie former USC volleyball star.

Seen here, unfortunately, hobnobbing with a certain someone...


Talk About Embarrassing Pictures On The Web...

I was curious to see what I could find out about this mystery man. This is what I uncovered:

His father, Greg, was a script writer on the CBS series "Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman" and his mother is a set designer. Matt and his family had to live in a hotel for weeks after the Northridge earthquake of 1994 destroyed their home.

Cassel was actually better at baseball as a kid. He batted cleanup on Northridge California's national championship Little League team in 1994, which eventually lost to Venezuela in the Little League World Series. "He's got tools other guys might not possess," his little league coach said. "He doesn't let anything bother him."

Then, his sophomore year, he took over as quarterback. He followed a solid sophomore season with a jaw-dropping junior year, quarterbacking his team to a championship.

His sophomore year football coach said, "With his personality, he's one of those kids who can throw an interception, then come back and throw a touchdown. I haven't had many kids who can go one play at a time. He's a big-time player, no question."

His high school girlfriend was a major hottie too:


She's a "professional model." Sort of like Gisele!

I guess that's what you get when you're the star quarterback.

He was ranked the #53 prospect in the nation coming out of high school. Although it should be noted, no one else in the top 100 that year has become an NFL superstar, except maybe Willis McGahee at #16.

There was no doubt he'd be a big star at USC. Carson Palmer was leaving for the NFL soon.

"It's a good situation at USC. I get to learn behind Carson Palmer for a few years and then I'll get my shot. I just want to make the most of my opportunity," Cassel said, back in 2000.

His freshman year, he threw only two passes, but ran for 22 yards.

Then... well. Then the career path got derailed. Paul Hackett, who was high on Cassel, was let go. Pete Carroll came in. Cassel backed up Palmer in 2002, throwing 4 passes, completing 3 for 27 yards. But the next season, Matt Leinart, not Cassel, got the starting nod. From then on, the kid with the golden arm didn't make one start at quarterback. His only start was.. very weirdly.. at tight end.

Cassel's junior year, he threw 13 passes. Senior year, he threw 14 passes and completed 10, for 97 yards and an interception.

Leinart took the reins and never looked back, becoming a 1st round draft pick of the Arizona Cardinals. Cassel was chosen in the 7th round by the Patriots, who were roundly criticized for being out of their minds. One respected sports magazine called their draft choices "bizarre."

This guy was high on Cassel before it became popular. He goes as far as comparing him to Matt Hasselbeck, though the comparisons he offers are far from compelling.

All in all, what we have here is the story of a gifted athlete who was all set for big things-- but then missed out on his big break.

I hope it doesn't happen against the New York Jets.

One more picture of Bridget for good measure:


Let's Hope Her Baby Doesn't Inherit Brady's Weak Knees

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P.S. Curt Schilling's wrong. New Yorkers don't take glee in Brady's injury. We take glee in Curt Schilling's injury. Cause he's an obnoxious jerk.

Better Than Perfect



"They were feeling good. But we didn't treat them like an undefeated team. We didn't treat them like some Greek myth. There was no Godzilla out there.'' - New York Football Giants Wide Receiver David Tyree

Pandemonium in the streets. Chants of 18 and 1!! echoing from bars. New York City was celebrating last night, and it will be celebrating all month, if not all year, after watching the greatest upset in the history of professional football.

New York hasn't had much to celebrate recently. Since 2001, when the terrorists attacked the World Trade Center, New York sports hadn't had a good time of it. The Yankees lost to the Diamondbacks that year. Then the Marlins beat the Yanks (two recent expansion clubs! over the venerable Yankees!). Then came the infamous Red Sox disaster, when the Yankees held a 3-0 lead in the series and blew it, allowing Boston to win its first World Series since before electricity. Then came the bug game in Cleveland. Even the Mets decided to destroy the hearts of New Yorkers by seemingly locking in a playoff spot last season and then tanking it. I don't need to discuss other sports. The Knicks have been a joke for quite some while. The Rangers never played to their potential, and who knows about the Metrostars? Yes, the past few years have not been good to the Big Apple.

Last night changed all that. The Giants abused Patriots quarterback Tom Brady all night, treating him like the two-timing bastard he is. Not even Brady's dimpled chin could slow down the onslaught of the Giants' defensive line.



Brady fumbled that ball just like he fumbled his paternal responsibility for his child.

The Patriots took the lead late, but I still believed victory was possible. The Giants had time.

With a brilliant evasive move by Eli Manning, and a "how-the-hell-did-he-do-that?" catch by David Tyree, the Giants kept their hopes alive.



Chills, seriously.

For those of you who don't follow the Giants, or football... Eli Manning has been criticized his entire career for poor decision-making. And that guy who caught the pass, David Tyree? Well, Amani Toomer, the Giants' longtime wideout summed it up nicely: "He was dropping everything in practice Friday. " Toomer was being kind. Tyree's dropped everything for 20 weeks.

In that one play, they became legends.



And a few plays later, Plaxico Burress, who is missing one entire leg (and has been all year), completely faked out the Patriots defense and scored on a wide open pass play in the end zone. A few seconds later, that was all she wrote. I cried tears of joy. I wept like a baby.

The Patriots pursuit of perfection derailed. Boston fans everywhere hanging themselves. I went out to celebrate with friends, and Professor Thom's, a bar owned by Bostoners, wouldn't let us in, because we were chanting "18-1." Screw em. Let them have their shitty, empty, depressing bar. We'll take the greatest victory the NFL has ever seen (since the last time a New York team... the Jets... upset a heavily favored Goliath.)

Congrats to the Giants!! I may have badmouthed them at times this year, and at one point, even called for Tom Coughlin's firing. But that's all in the past. Life-time contract for Tom I say. And long-live Eli, the King of New York.

"Forget that parade in Boston. We're having one in New York City.'' -Giants Defensive End Michael Strahan



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PLUS: Bill Simmons, Boston fan, is a very gracious loser. He also points out that the miracle play has yet to have a name. Adam's Life will be taking suggestions. Post them in the comments below.

Here's my suggestions:

The Perfect Play
The Impossible Play
The Drunken Kangaroo Play (that's the best I can describe the "look" of the play)
The Desert Mirage (because i still can't believe it was real)
The E.T. Play (because the Eli to Tyree play seemed extraterrestrial... and resembled Elliot's flight silhouetted by the moon)
Supernatural (that's what David Tyree called it)

eh... help me out here.

Broken Brady? Don't Believe It, Giants



The news today, on its surface, should make New York Giants fans cheer: New Endland Patriots quarterback Tom Brady was seen wearing a cast on his leg. But Big Blue Boosters shouldn't get too excited... I have a feeling this is all an elaborate ploy by coaching mastermind Bill Belichik.

Suddenly finding his team about to face a red-hot, determined Giants squad, Bill needed to find a way to lull the Giants into a false sense of security. By making Brady look injured, he's hoping the Giants won't prepare as hard to face him.

What evidence to I have for this?

Curt Schilling's "Bloody Sock."



A sports journalist reported that Red Sox cather Doug Mirabelli told him that Schilling's bloody sock was faked. Of course, Mirabelli denied it, and the sports journalist recanted. But I still don't trust those Bostoners. If Schilling can fake a bloody ankle to lull the Yankees to sleep, then is it so far-fetched to think Brady, another chowda-head, wouldn't do the same thing?

After all, Brady is far from a stand-up guy. As we all recall, he left:



for



Need more evidence? He was spotted LAST NIGHT without the walking cast. Shenanigans!!



So my advice to the Giants? Practice as if Brady is perfectly fine. Actually, practice as if he just got a robot super arm installed. And 4-wheel-drive. And laser beams for eyes. Because if it's two things we know, its that we can't trust Bill Belicheat's injury report and we can't trust New England sports stars.

Let's Go Blue!!