Friday, February 10, 2012

So What Year Is It Again?

Obama is expected to announce today an amendment to a rule requiring employers to provide health coverage that includes birth control-- something 99% of women in this country use, something that's been on the books since the year 2000, and something that hasn't been remotely controversial for more than two decades.

Meanwhile, NBC, the NFL and FCC are going crazy about a lewd, disgusting act at the Super Bowl that has threatened to destroy the fabric of American life and corrupt the youth of the nation forever...

M.I.A.'s split-second middle finger flash during the halftime show (something NO ONE at my Super Bowl party noticed on a 47 inch HDTV screen.):



Next up, Facebook to be charged with witchcraft because it allows members to "steal people's souls" by posting "photography."

As top YouTube commenter Syrennia Lestrange puts it:
Oh yeah, we should really care about a word people say and a gesture people make on a daily basis when poverty is running rampant and the country is in a recession.
Amen to that.

Thursday, February 09, 2012

Chicago Nixes Design Over Gang-like Symbols, Chooses Ambiguously Gay Duo Fondling Penis Instead

The city of Chicago held a contest for area youth to draw the new sticker to be displayed on Police, Fire and Paramedic vehicles. 15-year-old Herbert Pulgar's design won:

Awesome Chicago Sticker Design

Beautiful, right? Unity, togetherness, heroes.

Then a blogger named Detective Shaved Longcock (yes, that's right) suggested the design echoed the signs of notorious street gang the Maniac Latin Disciples.

On its own, the sticker design doesn't really reveal much. The heart is a symbol of the gang... but its also a heart. The hands reaching up are twisted into a shape that could, if viewed the right way, resemble the pitchfork sign used by the gang.

But most damning is the background information Detective Longcock (yes, again) uncovered. Digging into the Facebook pages of Herbert and his family, he unearthed photos of blunt-smoking, bandana-wearing, gun-toting and well, gang-sign-flashing.

Now the city is switching designs to avoid any resemblance to things related to gang activity:


Uh... wait a minute...

Those guys on the right look familiar...


Um... yeah.

What was third place? The Chicago police, fire and paramedics depicted as the three little pigs?

This is why you don't have kids draw things.

Monday, February 06, 2012

Advice For The Giants Ticker Tape Parade

I unfortunately missed the deadline today to apply for City Hall seats to the Giants Super Bowl Champions Parade. That means, if I want to go, I'll have to vie with the masses for a glimpse of the glorious G-men somewhere along the parade route.

Here's a compendium of resources I put together in the past for the Yankees Ticker Tape Parade. The same rules still apply:

Let The Ticker Tape Parade Commence!

Then again, your experience will never be better than this: The Guy Who Became A Giant For A Day

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