Why Homophibia Isn't An "Opinion," It's Wrong

Jessie Bering has a nice story on Slate.com today, a rebuttal against conservative claims that accepting homosexual behavior is wrong. (he must have read my piece a few weeks ago) He makes four main points:

-Homosexuality is not a choice. Because no one "chooses" to be straight. There's not a moment in everyone's life where they stop and think, "Hmm, men or women??? This is sooo hard to decide!!!!!" Bering writes: "A true heterosexual... has never experienced meaningful same-sex desires and understands that one cannot choose to act on what is simply not there." If that's true, then isn't it equally valid to say a gay man or woman similarly never faces such a "choice?"

-Homosexuality is not any more disgusting than heterosexual relations. To wit, homosexuals are not the only ones participating in anal sex, and... I mean, if its totally legal for Rosanne Barr and Tom Arnold to get it on, well, we shouldn't really be concerning ourselves with legislating relationships based on how pleasing or disgusting they are to think about. Bering writes, "...because of disgust rhetoric, [bigots] have sexualized gays and lesbians to such a degree that all they can see in them is contaminated bodily excretions. Lofty emotions such as love and romance are for actual straight human beings like them, not for filthy animals fornicating and spreading disease."

-Homosexuality is not a mental illness. Bering writes: "The American Psychiatric Association officially removed homosexuality from its diagnostic manual in 1973. The consensus—which has been reiterated many times since—was that in spite of the toxic social conditions in which they so often find themselves, the majority of gays and lesbians are well-adjusted, high-functioning, and contributing members of society. Emotional health issues such as depression, low self-esteem, and suicidal thoughts found at higher than average rates among gays and lesbians are the consequences of their living in an intolerant world." Well said. The only harm that comes from this "mental illness" is the harm inflicted by other people.

-Homosexuality is not "unnatural" or "against God." Here's where Bering goes a little off the rails... "what all men really should be doing is putting their penises to the promiscuous use for which they were intentionally designed. And about every other day, women should fill their vaginal canals with the seminal fluid of a different man. If that makes you uncomfortable, take it up with the Creator." The truth is, he doesn't really need to go there. The reality is, interpretations of the Bible vary among different religious groups and among the followers in that group. While evangelicals may uniformly believe God is telling them "gay is wrong," others who believe in God do not believe that. Remember.... the Bible was once interpreted to say that the world was flat, that black people were the sons of Cain, that Jews murdered Jesus, and so on. We've since become enlightened otherwise. As for unnatural... have you read 50 Shades of Grey? No one is calling for that behavior to disqualify couples from marriage. Not all straight couples can have kids, or want to. If the sole purpose of a marriage is to generate offspring, then why not outlaw sterile couples or childless couples as well? And what is natural? Hell, light bulbs are unnatural. Are we outlawing them?

All the other arguments against homosexuality are equally bunk. All gays are pedophiles? Well, we already have laws against pedophilia. It's as ridiculous an argument as saying all gun owners are murderers. See what I did there?

Are all lesbians just man haters? Well, I play on a softball team with a few of them, and they seem to like me.

Will we all start marrying animals? Let's say you want to marry your dog. How do you know if he wants to marry you? The issue here is consent. Two adult males or two adult females can freely voice their consent to marriage. Your dog's "ruff ruff" does not constitute a legally binding agreement.

The bottom line is, there shouldn't be any laws regulating anything two consenting people do with each other, as long as they aren't hurting anybody else. And making you feel disgusted doesn't qualify as hurt. Otherwise the makers of The Real Housewives shows on Bravo would be in jail right now as far as I'm concerned.

If you're allowed to wear a clown costume while hanging upside down with a banana in your ass singing the Star-Spangled Banner while a girl you met at the bar hours before gives you a Red Hot (like snowballing, but with hot sauce), then you really shouldn't be concerned if two people of the same sex  who love each other want to get married.

Really, why do you want the government in your bedroom so bad?